Friends and Mentors
It has been nearly six years that my mentor and friend died, but yet it seems like yesterday. When a man continues to have admiration and respect long after his death, he was truly a man to be admired and respected.
My mentor was a benevolent man - a giver of gifts. He once gave me his microwave oven (back when they were expensive and unique) when I mentioned how long it took to cook meals after I came home from work. He said he never used it. Three weeks later, he sent me to pick up a package. It was another microwave oven. Apparently, he used it more than he thought.
My mentor taught me to give. When I was trying to buy my first home, he gave me advice. He talked me out of buying a fixer-upper that years later, slid down the hill. When I couldn't afford the house that he approved, he wrote me a check for the down payment told me to "go get my house". Six years later, I was able to loan that same amount to a young physician, pregnant with her first child, so she could buy her first house. He gave me a lesson on the pleasure of helping others that I have never forgotten. He enjoyed being a "jump-starter" for me and numerous others.
My mentor was my teacher. He used life as his classroom and never missed a teaching opportunity. When I was in a terrible car accident...thrown through the front windshield, he brought his teenage daughter out of her bed to see my bloodied and scarred face and told her, "See why you should always wear seat-belts." I was glad I was there to drive that lesson home.
My mentor made me part of his family. His youngest daughter became my little sister that I took to the zoo and carried on my shoulders. Not being Jewish, I fondly remember my first Seder, sharing this precious, ancient ceremony with his family. One of my proudest moments came years later when I stood as his Best Man when he remarried. My son is getting married next year and I will again remind him of the name that he shares with my mentor. This week, his youngest daughter visited me with three of her six little children, and I saw my mentor's face again...in one of his little grandchildren.
My mentor taught me about trust. He always had something confidential to share with me, even things that were obvious that everyone knew. Regardless of the secret he would share, I never betrayed his trust. As the years went by, we shared many private moments and secrets. I will cherish those even more now, since there will be no more. It is certainly no secret how much I loved this man.
My mentor inspired me to achieve. There was something about him that made you want to try harder...that made you want to please him and earn his approval. Having his approval was equivalent to winning the Congressional Medal of Honor. He would make you feel special and make you proud. In the Preface of my first textbook that I published, I gave tribute to my friend and mentor. When I sent him a copy, he told me how proud he was of me. During the years that we worked together side by side, he would often give me one of his famous notes written on a 3x5 card that told me how much he appreciated my friendship. They were worth more than gold to me.
I talked to my mentor a few days before he died. We had a wonderful conversation and were making plans to get together the following week. I was glad that I told him how much his friendship meant to me, because that was our last conversation. A few days later, I sadly helped carry my mentor's coffin to his final resting place. This was only fitting because of the number of times he helped carry me.
Most men do not like to cry. They think it is a sign of weakness. I think it is a sign of being a man. I am proud to shed tears of respect and admiration for a man that was my mentor... and my friend.
Post a comment and tell me about your mentor, or better yet, make a commitment to mentor others.
Related Topics: Heroes Among Us, Boys 2 Men: A Healthy Transition from Boyhood to Manhood
My mentor was a benevolent man - a giver of gifts. He once gave me his microwave oven (back when they were expensive and unique) when I mentioned how long it took to cook meals after I came home from work. He said he never used it. Three weeks later, he sent me to pick up a package. It was another microwave oven. Apparently, he used it more than he thought.
My mentor taught me to give. When I was trying to buy my first home, he gave me advice. He talked me out of buying a fixer-upper that years later, slid down the hill. When I couldn't afford the house that he approved, he wrote me a check for the down payment told me to "go get my house". Six years later, I was able to loan that same amount to a young physician, pregnant with her first child, so she could buy her first house. He gave me a lesson on the pleasure of helping others that I have never forgotten. He enjoyed being a "jump-starter" for me and numerous others.
My mentor was my teacher. He used life as his classroom and never missed a teaching opportunity. When I was in a terrible car accident...thrown through the front windshield, he brought his teenage daughter out of her bed to see my bloodied and scarred face and told her, "See why you should always wear seat-belts." I was glad I was there to drive that lesson home.
My mentor made me part of his family. His youngest daughter became my little sister that I took to the zoo and carried on my shoulders. Not being Jewish, I fondly remember my first Seder, sharing this precious, ancient ceremony with his family. One of my proudest moments came years later when I stood as his Best Man when he remarried. My son is getting married next year and I will again remind him of the name that he shares with my mentor. This week, his youngest daughter visited me with three of her six little children, and I saw my mentor's face again...in one of his little grandchildren.
My mentor taught me about trust. He always had something confidential to share with me, even things that were obvious that everyone knew. Regardless of the secret he would share, I never betrayed his trust. As the years went by, we shared many private moments and secrets. I will cherish those even more now, since there will be no more. It is certainly no secret how much I loved this man.
My mentor inspired me to achieve. There was something about him that made you want to try harder...that made you want to please him and earn his approval. Having his approval was equivalent to winning the Congressional Medal of Honor. He would make you feel special and make you proud. In the Preface of my first textbook that I published, I gave tribute to my friend and mentor. When I sent him a copy, he told me how proud he was of me. During the years that we worked together side by side, he would often give me one of his famous notes written on a 3x5 card that told me how much he appreciated my friendship. They were worth more than gold to me.
I talked to my mentor a few days before he died. We had a wonderful conversation and were making plans to get together the following week. I was glad that I told him how much his friendship meant to me, because that was our last conversation. A few days later, I sadly helped carry my mentor's coffin to his final resting place. This was only fitting because of the number of times he helped carry me.
Most men do not like to cry. They think it is a sign of weakness. I think it is a sign of being a man. I am proud to shed tears of respect and admiration for a man that was my mentor... and my friend.
Post a comment and tell me about your mentor, or better yet, make a commitment to mentor others.
Related Topics: Heroes Among Us, Boys 2 Men: A Healthy Transition from Boyhood to Manhood
Tags:
3 Comments:
I just wanted to say that I am adoring your blog. I have heard for years about how wonderful you are on WebMD board but I liked to keep my former ear candling, current evil q-tip wielding self away from your boards. But I have your nice rss feed and sigh (in a good way) every time I read your posts. You are one cool guy.
Thanks...and I love you, too.
Sorry to hear this nice man you were close to died. It is a great thing to seek to follow in his footsteps by mentoring others as you have the opportunity to do so. You asked for posts about mentors, and mine would be Mrs. McGee. She encouraged me in my young married life to stick with it and apply God's principles in it(and we are still married over 15 years later), and spent many hours discipling me individually in her home when I became a believer in Christ. Fortunately, she still lives (though her husband and my other mentor passed away last year), and I seek to emulate her mentoring of me in the lives of others who are brought across my path, too.
Post a Comment