Silent John: Dealing with Deafness
I have known John for over twenty-five years. He is a pharmacist at a busy chain store not far from our home. John is a gregarious guy with the same warped sense of humor as I. As a matter of fact, we have told the same jokes to each other over the years, that we now just amuse ourselves by just saying the punch line. Soon, we will just assign numbers to the jokes.
"Hey, John -- number thirty-eight." He will laugh and tell me that is a good one.
John has his health issues. I wrote about one of them here.
Two years ago, he called me on the way to surgery for his heart. He went into his doctor with chest pain; a few hours later, he was heading into surgery for a multiple vessel bypass; another close call.
For the last several years, I have noticed that John has been having difficulty hearing. He did get a hearing aid a few years ago, but did not like wearing it. His job at the pharmacy requires that he answer the phone constantly; and he needs to counsel patients on their medications. It takes quite a while to get used to having a device in your ear, and to get used to the new artificially-enhanced hearing. We had dinner with him shortly after he got his hearing aids and the difference was dramatic. We did not have to shout or look directly at him; and he stayed involved in the conversations. In the past, he would simply doze off sleeping.
About a month or so ago, on a recent road trip to pick up some medical equipment, John could not understand the dialogue on a radio talk show. I had to literally shout to have a conversation with him on this 18-hour round trip. He was not wearing his hearing aids. It was exhausting for me to try and raise my voice to the level where he could understand.
Last night, we had dinner with him and his wife. About a week ago, his hearing took another downward dive. He was nearly completely deaf, now. I literally had to shout in his ears to get a reaction. His wife was very upset that he is not using his hearing aids, which he said did not help. His solution to the issue was to get others to answer the phone in the pharmacy; not really a viable option. Or, he will need to go on disability. He was visibly depressed. He feels that his hearing has digressed to the point where hearing aids will not be effective. He was not the same person that I knew for a quarter of a century.
He was encouraged to see his ENT and audiologist this week. I would like to talk to him on the phone, but he does not have that ability right now. I will call his wife today.
Fear of going completely deaf is a valid fear, but if it happens, it is not the end of the world, or even his professional career. Yes, he may have to make some significant adaptations to his life, but he would not be the alone. All of us, at some time in our lives, will have to make adjustments. Many people think the worst without having all of the facts. They feel a lump and immediately think TUMOR, CANCER, or FUNERAL ARRANGEMENTS. John's hearing plummeted in a very short time. He is thinking that he will have to live the rest of his life in a silent world; but he does not have all of the facts. He may be very embarrassed to find out that his problem is correctable, or he may find out this week that he and his family will have to make some life adjustments.
Life was never intended to be fair. E.coli happens. Lumps can be cancer, and sudden hearing losses can be permanent. As humans, there is not much we can do to change these unexpected bumps in the road, but we do have the ability to change our attitude. As soon as we are finished feeling sorry for ourselves, there is a whole lotta life out there worth living. John may have entered a world that is more silent than the one he prefers, but you do not need ears to listen to the rhythm of life.
"Hey, John...Number 47."
Related Topics:
Technorati Tags: hearing loss, deafness, aging, hearing aids, adaptive technologies
"Hey, John -- number thirty-eight." He will laugh and tell me that is a good one.
John has his health issues. I wrote about one of them here.
Two years ago, he called me on the way to surgery for his heart. He went into his doctor with chest pain; a few hours later, he was heading into surgery for a multiple vessel bypass; another close call.
For the last several years, I have noticed that John has been having difficulty hearing. He did get a hearing aid a few years ago, but did not like wearing it. His job at the pharmacy requires that he answer the phone constantly; and he needs to counsel patients on their medications. It takes quite a while to get used to having a device in your ear, and to get used to the new artificially-enhanced hearing. We had dinner with him shortly after he got his hearing aids and the difference was dramatic. We did not have to shout or look directly at him; and he stayed involved in the conversations. In the past, he would simply doze off sleeping.
About a month or so ago, on a recent road trip to pick up some medical equipment, John could not understand the dialogue on a radio talk show. I had to literally shout to have a conversation with him on this 18-hour round trip. He was not wearing his hearing aids. It was exhausting for me to try and raise my voice to the level where he could understand.
Last night, we had dinner with him and his wife. About a week ago, his hearing took another downward dive. He was nearly completely deaf, now. I literally had to shout in his ears to get a reaction. His wife was very upset that he is not using his hearing aids, which he said did not help. His solution to the issue was to get others to answer the phone in the pharmacy; not really a viable option. Or, he will need to go on disability. He was visibly depressed. He feels that his hearing has digressed to the point where hearing aids will not be effective. He was not the same person that I knew for a quarter of a century.
He was encouraged to see his ENT and audiologist this week. I would like to talk to him on the phone, but he does not have that ability right now. I will call his wife today.
Fear of going completely deaf is a valid fear, but if it happens, it is not the end of the world, or even his professional career. Yes, he may have to make some significant adaptations to his life, but he would not be the alone. All of us, at some time in our lives, will have to make adjustments. Many people think the worst without having all of the facts. They feel a lump and immediately think TUMOR, CANCER, or FUNERAL ARRANGEMENTS. John's hearing plummeted in a very short time. He is thinking that he will have to live the rest of his life in a silent world; but he does not have all of the facts. He may be very embarrassed to find out that his problem is correctable, or he may find out this week that he and his family will have to make some life adjustments.
Life was never intended to be fair. E.coli happens. Lumps can be cancer, and sudden hearing losses can be permanent. As humans, there is not much we can do to change these unexpected bumps in the road, but we do have the ability to change our attitude. As soon as we are finished feeling sorry for ourselves, there is a whole lotta life out there worth living. John may have entered a world that is more silent than the one he prefers, but you do not need ears to listen to the rhythm of life.
"Hey, John...Number 47."
Related Topics:
Technorati Tags: hearing loss, deafness, aging, hearing aids, adaptive technologies
6 Comments:
My Grandma recently got hearing aids, becasue she was sick and tired of her children talking about her behind her back. So, she got them, but she never wears them. So now the grandchildren and her children are always yelling at her when we talk to her. When we are done talking we just start laughing because it's ridiculous. When we ask her why she does not wear them she said everything is to loud for her. I am sure they takes time getting use to, but I think I would rather hear than not be able to.
All hope's not lost, he may be a cochlear implant candidate!
I'm hoping someone can help me. I have hearing loss in both ears but one is basically deaf. The other has what is known as a "cookie bite" hearing loss. The mid-range that includes human voice. I work and a large portion of my work is on the phone. Hearing aids have not helped. I have some nerve damage so clarity is a problem. I just don't need it louder, I need it clearer. Has anyone been successful with hearing aids who has this type of hearing loss?
Please refer specific questions regaring ears, hearing loss, etc. to the WebMD ENT Board. I will address questions there.....
Thank you.
Due to nasopharyngeal cancer therapy years ago, I lost all my hearing slowly. Then double vision, corrected TWICE surgically, then limited swallowing,tooth loss, weight loss, and other FIBROTIC changes from cancer treatments. JUST THANK GOD for all the years you COULD HEAR, and use the CLOSED CAPTIONING on TV daily. Put a SIGN in car, that TELLS of PROFOUND HEARING LOSS, in case of ambulance or POLICE sirens.
I just started losing my hearing AND STARTED wondering whats it like to go deaf
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