The Making of a Woose (Wuss)

A woose (pronounced, wuss) is a common slang term for someone (usually a guy) that is disproportionately afraid of certain things. We used to just call them weenies or wimps. No one is really born a woose, but they are created and they do live among us. Maybe you know one. Maybe you ARE one?

In the medical arena, some of the biggest fears that I encounter are people that are afraid of needles, blood draws, and anything that might cause pain, like a surgical or dental procedure. A 15-month-old child is afraid of just about everything or everybody. In my office, the crying begins in the waiting room when they start to figure out where they are. It is exemplified when we take off their clothes and weigh them. Their fear reaches a peak when I walk in the room and begin a routine examination. They will often cry for the entire exam. This is expected behavior for this age group. It is NOT expected behavior for a 15-YEAR-old, or worse, a 50-year-old.

Today, I removed a dozen or so sutures from the leg of a 15-year-old football player. He had cut his leg two weeks ago and was sutured at the ER. According to the mother, he acted like a two-year-old in the ER with crying and pleading not to be sutured. I saw him a few days after being sutured, and he was distraught over seeing some blood on his dressing, so I knew the suture removal would be challenging. He had a dozen, easy-to-remove sutures that were ready to come out. He jumped when I cut the first suture (it is really impossible to feel pain when a string is cut!) and complained the entire time.

Later in the day, I had to do some toenail surgery on another teen. During the procedure to anesthetize his toe, he became nauseated, and then fainted. The mother danced around screaming that her son was dying! Fortunately, he was lying on a surgical table that I could quickly tilt his head downward. He returned from death in a few seconds, and the rest of the procedure went fine, although both mother and son looked very white. As a contrast, I did the exact same procedure on a 13-year-old girl later in the afternoon. She did just fine. No pain. And, she just listened to her iPod the entire time.

For some reason, I have become the Toenail King in our office. Nearly all of the nail avulsions (removing the nail) are scheduled for me. Granted, I have done a few thousand in my career, so I do have the experience. A few years ago, I was asked to do a toenail avulsion on a doctor's teenage daughter. If anything ever goes wrong, it is usually when you treat a colleague's family! I had never met the girl before this procedure. She was clearly mentally and physically challenged; walking down the hall with a very unstable gait, supported by her dad, an obstetrician. Her voice was slurred. As I tried to explain the procedure to her, it was obvious that she did not understand. She had a distant, wandering look in her eyes. The procedure went well, and I scheduled her to return for a follow up visit. A week later, a perfectly coordinated and coherent young woman introduced herself to me. I was absolutely floored. Apparently, without informing me, her doctor/father administered a potent medication to her prior to the toenail procedure last week because she was "freaking out." She was not mentally or physically challenged at all. She was drugged out of her mind.

Over the years, I have had parents faint when I suture a child (much to the amusement of the real patient!). One parent even left his four-year-old being sutured and ran away. We found him, sitting on a curb outside, rocking and moaning.

"Sorry, I just couldn't be there." The four-year-old took his hand and said, "Its okay, Daddy."

When my son, Ryan was a child, it usually took a team of bouncers to hold him down for a little blood test. He had a prior history of being afraid of the dark, bees, and bogymen. The other kids used to tease him and tell him a bee was on his back. He would scream hysterically, much to their delight. He once paid his sister a dollar to tell him if there was a bee on him or not (there was not). He is now a registered nurse working in the emergency room. Before starting nursing school, he was required to do some clinical observation time in my office. He passed out watching a routine circumcision. He got married last year to a Jewish woman. If the have a son someday, I definitely am going to video tape that bris. He is going to pass out cold and I am going to get it on You Tube.

Wooses come in all ages and all sexes. We all have fears that we must face. Some fears are more reasonable than others. Personally, I do not like heights. Because I also have vertigo, I am not the safest person to be up a ladder. I am also not a big fan of real tight places, like an MRI! I don't like that machine at all. In the MRI tube, I am Super Woose!

Related Topics:

• WebMD Video: Kids and Needle Anxiety
• WebMD Video: Easing Kids Hospital Fears

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