Men are Bad Pill-Takers

Men are often targets of generalizations. Because I am a man, I feel that it is okay to take some liberties on this issue of medication noncompliance. In my professional experience, men cannot be trusted with complying with medication. Men who are taking antibiotics for infection tend to "forget" doses much more often than women. They also are more likely to stop their treatment early if they are feeling better. It is no wonder that men die sooner than our female counterparts. When men are the primary caregivers for their children, they also forget to give prescribed medicine to them, too. If men are questioned by their medical providers about compliance, they will lie. Men are not shy about asking for shots for their children instead of taking the responsibility for giving oral medications. The children are not pleased.

There has been research for years developing a male birth control pill. If that every happened, I would caution women not to trust them. Not only will they forget to take their pill, they would lie about it if it meant not having sex. If man cannot complete a ten day course of antibiotics, how can they be trusted to take a daily pill to prevent pregnancy? There is an old joke about a male birth control pill that is not swallowed, but goes in your shoe. The shoe? Yes, they put the pill in their shoe and it makes them limp.

Women seem to be better with certain details. Guys, on the other hand, forget things that they determine are unimportant, like pulling up their zippers. Women will not go out with their dresses unzipped. Men forget to comb their hair, brush their teeth, and do requested chores. Women leave the curling iron on and forget to lock the car.

One of my priorities in life is to conserve energy. When I am not in a room, I turn off the lights. My wife does not understand that light switches have an off position. She will turn on every light in the house and then leave for work. I turn down the thermostat and put on a sweater. She turns up the thermostat to 80, thinking it will heat up the house faster than if she puts it on 72. However, my wife does remember to take her medications, and she reminds me to take mine.

After over three decades in medicine, you would think that I would be more compliant with my own medications, but I was a man long before I was a medical professional. I only take a few "real pills"; the rest are vitamins, fish oil, minerals, etc. that my wife throws in the mix. She could be slowly poisoning me; I wouldn't know. Some of those capsules are the size of rectal suppositories; I don't know whether to swallow them or insert them. Even though it has been proven that vitamin C does not prevent colds (Sorry, Mr. Pauling), she still makes me take vitamin C. I have gotten many colds. I have not gotten scurvy. Yes, I do believe in the benefits of antioxidants, but come on, I do not want to take a handful of pills and capsules. Psychologically, this is not a man-thing.

I think women like taking pills. They must. My wife takes twice as many as I will tolerate. The other day, I saw my 31-year-old daughter swallow a dozen or so vitamins(?) at the sushi restaurant. Personally, I would rather get my fish oil from sushi. As she downed that fistful of vitamins, my son told of his experience spilling an entire bottle of some horrible-smelling fish oil that was prescribed by his doctor. He wiped it up with some towels and threw it in the laundry with his wife's good clothes - not a good idea. I suspect he wouldn't have taken that bad-tasting fish oil anyway.

My late friend and mentor, Bob, took more nutritional supplements than any human I had ever met. He was an exception to the "men are bad pill-takers" generalization. When Bob passed away in his eighties, I volunteered to help his family dispose of his extensive home pharmacy. As a physician and former pharmacist himself, Bob was big on self-medication that promoted longevity. He was always his own doctor; perhaps, in retrospect, not his wisest choice. He literally had thousands (I am not exaggerating) of various nutritional supplements, herbal concoctions, homeopathics, etc. Nutritional supplements or not, we will all eventually die. Until his sudden demise, I felt that Bob was a very healthy man, but I am not convinced it was due to his use of these multiple supplements.

If men have to take pills, they want to keep it simple: once a day (maybe) is about the best they can do. If any medication is prescribed more than once per day, it will be forgotten at least half of the time. Giving a man an injection in the office is just about the only way to assure full compliance. If the pills cause ANY side effects, even side effects not associated with the medication, it will be promptly stopped. If men do not have insurance and have to pay for the medication, they will not buy it. Women think nothing of paying a hundred bucks for a prescription. For men, twenty bucks - tops. If it costs more than twenty bucks, they will just take their chances.

If the pills taste funny, or cause them to burp with an odd taste/smell, they will not take them. If the pills are too big or scary-looking, they will not take them. If the capsules are red or black, men will most likely think they cause side effects. If the pills are pink, they will not be strong enough to cure their ailment.

Men are not easy patients to treat; even the little men (boys). Men do provide valuable services to society, like killing spiders, hanging shelves, changing tires, or providing chromosomes. True, men do not like to take pills...or see doctors for that matter. If you have one of these men in your life; please help him.

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