Larry the Seasick Sailor

My older brother and I grew up in land-locked, rural Appalachia. The only source of recreational water for our use was a shallow, contaminated creek and a stagnant pond called the Canoe Canal. Our town had just one canoe and it was rarely seen on this tiny inland sea. Maybe it was this obvious lack of water recreational resources that created an interest in water sports.

I selected the kayak. It was smaller, cheaper, and more portable. My wife and I like to explore in our Klepper. For those of you that are not familiar with this classic kayak, allow me to share. The Klepper is a hundred year old German-designed sea kayak that is collapsable into two bags. It has a frame of wood that you have to assemble like a big Tinker Toy and a skin of very durable fabric. It has a rudder, two comfortable seats, and room for gear. This is a very serious, seaworthy craft. As a matter of fact, a German physician by the name of Hannes Lindermann actually paddled (and sailed) an identical kayak across the Atlantic Ocean in 1956 in 72 days! Of course, I was five years old at the time, chucking rocks into the Canoe Canal. Since my heritage is German as well, I wonder if I have some of that craziness myself.

Since I am a careful and cautious explorer, I wanted a kayak that was stable - I do not want any unintentional Eskimo rolls. So, years ago, I bought a used Klepper. Since that time, my wife and I have paddled in Mexico, Australia's Great Barrier Reef, New Zealand, British Columbia, and Jamaica. We also had it in the Puget Sound and around the San Juan Islands. It is already packed for another trip to the Sea of Cortez in April. On our first trip, we did get into a little storm of sorts. I can still hear her cussing me out over the howl of the wind and the breaking of the waves over the bow. Incidentally, my wife will be 62 and I will soon be 57. We don't do storms anymore and you sure as hell will not see me trying to cross an ocean in a kayak!

FYI: The picture is of me in the Klepper. I am in the stern; my friend, George (not my brother...or my wife!) is in the bow seat. We are off of the coast of Santa Cruz, California.

My brother selected a sailboat. He bought his first sailboat about twenty years ago - a racing trimaran. They often say that the two happiest days of a man's life are the day he buys a boat and the day he sells it. A few years ago, my brother saw his beloved trimaran leaving with its new owner. No longer would he be able to sail the challenging waters of the Chesapeake. He only remained boatless for about a year. In January, he retired. Apparently, when you retire, you are obligated to buy another boat. I did not know that.

My brother (soon to be 65) bought another boat - a really big one this time. He will be upset since I don't remember what kind it is or how long it is, but just know that it is big. I have not personally inspected this ship, but I have seen many photographs. It is a white with a green bottom (not unlike me right now!)

This morning, I received an email that my brother (retired) is flying to Florida to help a friend bring a 40 foot plus sailboat up from Florida to the Chesapeake. The voyage is going to take a month; averaging 60 miles a day (on a good day). This will be my brother's longest sea voyage. Although they will most likely stick to the calmer waters in the sea channel close to shore, he is a bit anxious about getting seasick. Yes, Larry the Sailor gets seasick.

When Dramamine or Bonine do not work, he does use Transderm-Scop - little scopolamine patches that go behind your ears. I suspect Transderm will be all that he will need to hold down his breakfast, lunch, and dinner. If that doesn't do the trick, I told him about promethazine (Phenergan). This prescription medication is very effective in settling the seasick stomach, but at a price. Phenergan can make you very sleepy. Most people would rather be sleeping than feeding the fish over the railing. Assuming the seasick person can hold down the pills, this will likely solve the profound nausea caused by the motion of the ocean. For those unfortunate vomiters that cannot even hold down the medicine, promethazine is available as a rectal suppository. My brother did not want them. Hopefully, I will not get an email or cell call from some Atlantic port with a change of mind. I really should have sent him a couple promethazine suppositories anyway; perhaps encased in glass so he could "Break in Case of Emergency".

Since my big brother has wireless Internet, I will publicly wish him smooth sailing on his venture north:

May the wind be at your back, the sun in your face, and your tuna sandwich remain in your stomach.

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