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Looking Your Age
Getting older is not for sissies. I have had grey or white hair for nearly 15 years (I had to check some older photographs to be sure), so I look a bit older than my 57 years. I have been offered senior citizen discounts for over ten years now. At first, I was ready to beat the crap out of the teenager at Taco Bell that offered me my first discount; then I thought...why not? A buck is a buck. My wife, on the other hand, looks younger. She is 62; five years my senior - eligible for early Social Security, and a legal recipient of the coveted senior discount.
Since we both work together in the same clinic and commute in the same vehicle, we walk out together through the waiting room. Several boys about age 5 or 6 were sitting there watching television. One of them - one of my wife's patients - noticed us walking by.
"Is that your Dad?" he said, while pointing in my direction.
Of course, I did what any normal, reactionary medical provider would do under the same or similar circumstances. I picked him up and tried to kick his little butt, as he laughed and screamed. My wife thought it was great comment.
My next door neighbor married later in life to a younger woman. He was about 63; his wife was about 40. They had a ten year old son. One evening, they called me when he started to have chest pain. Although it did not seem cardiac in nature, I called an ambulance just in case. I decided to accompany him and his young son to the hospital in a separate car, mostly so I could bring him home when he was (hopefully) released. As he registered at the ER, a kindly receptionist put a sympathetic arm around the ten year old.
"Your grandfather will be just fine," she said.
"That's NOT my grandfather. That's my dad!" Of course, I pointed out that I was just a neighbor; not the father.
Working in a pediatric office, I see many examples of people "not looking their ages" - from the parents (grandparents?) to even the kids.
Children are maturing earlier now; especially the girls. Some blame it on our calorie-rich diet; others blame it on hidden hormones in our food and water or genetic aberrations. You expect a nine-year old to be just a little child, playing with dolls and such. You do not expect them to have breasts and other maturation signs like a 12 year old. By the time they do reach twelve, they are wearing some very suggestive clothing and look like they are 16 or 17. Parents are letting them wear low-riding pants that show most of their belly down to the pubis; and showing about an inch of their butt cracks. Some have (real) belly-button rings and sport fake tattoos.
Some of the mothers in my practice dress like the kids (or vice versa). Some appear too young to even have kids (they like to hear that), and of course, not all of them are the biological mothers. Some of the mothers are the younger, second wives - the step-mothers. And, a few of the young-looking mothers are actually the grandmothers! I routinely ask ANY woman accompanying a child if they are the parent or not. I don't assume anything...anymore.
When I was a kid, all we had to make us look bigger were candy cigarettes. Now, 40 years later, some of us are getting candy cancer from them. When I was a teenager, I desperately wanted to look older. I would color in my blonde mustache with my mother's eyebrow pencil so people could see it. As soon as my armpit and chest hair started growing in, I wanted to keep my shirt off at the pool. Now, 40 years later, I have hair growing out of my ears and covering my back like some kind of Sasquatch. Of course, my hair is just about white, so I guess it would be closer to the Abominable Snowman, or even Santa. Santa, of course, is ageless. I don't even think that Santa was ever a child. You never see any baby pictures of Santa, so that troubles me a bit.
With age comes wisdom, so I guess it is okay to look older...but, not too old. I never remember my grandmother as anything but old. I figured out that when I was six or seven years old, she was about 57 - my age!
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Since we both work together in the same clinic and commute in the same vehicle, we walk out together through the waiting room. Several boys about age 5 or 6 were sitting there watching television. One of them - one of my wife's patients - noticed us walking by.
"Is that your Dad?" he said, while pointing in my direction.
Of course, I did what any normal, reactionary medical provider would do under the same or similar circumstances. I picked him up and tried to kick his little butt, as he laughed and screamed. My wife thought it was great comment.
My next door neighbor married later in life to a younger woman. He was about 63; his wife was about 40. They had a ten year old son. One evening, they called me when he started to have chest pain. Although it did not seem cardiac in nature, I called an ambulance just in case. I decided to accompany him and his young son to the hospital in a separate car, mostly so I could bring him home when he was (hopefully) released. As he registered at the ER, a kindly receptionist put a sympathetic arm around the ten year old.
"Your grandfather will be just fine," she said.
"That's NOT my grandfather. That's my dad!" Of course, I pointed out that I was just a neighbor; not the father.
Working in a pediatric office, I see many examples of people "not looking their ages" - from the parents (grandparents?) to even the kids.
Children are maturing earlier now; especially the girls. Some blame it on our calorie-rich diet; others blame it on hidden hormones in our food and water or genetic aberrations. You expect a nine-year old to be just a little child, playing with dolls and such. You do not expect them to have breasts and other maturation signs like a 12 year old. By the time they do reach twelve, they are wearing some very suggestive clothing and look like they are 16 or 17. Parents are letting them wear low-riding pants that show most of their belly down to the pubis; and showing about an inch of their butt cracks. Some have (real) belly-button rings and sport fake tattoos.
Some of the mothers in my practice dress like the kids (or vice versa). Some appear too young to even have kids (they like to hear that), and of course, not all of them are the biological mothers. Some of the mothers are the younger, second wives - the step-mothers. And, a few of the young-looking mothers are actually the grandmothers! I routinely ask ANY woman accompanying a child if they are the parent or not. I don't assume anything...anymore.
When I was a kid, all we had to make us look bigger were candy cigarettes. Now, 40 years later, some of us are getting candy cancer from them. When I was a teenager, I desperately wanted to look older. I would color in my blonde mustache with my mother's eyebrow pencil so people could see it. As soon as my armpit and chest hair started growing in, I wanted to keep my shirt off at the pool. Now, 40 years later, I have hair growing out of my ears and covering my back like some kind of Sasquatch. Of course, my hair is just about white, so I guess it would be closer to the Abominable Snowman, or even Santa. Santa, of course, is ageless. I don't even think that Santa was ever a child. You never see any baby pictures of Santa, so that troubles me a bit.
With age comes wisdom, so I guess it is okay to look older...but, not too old. I never remember my grandmother as anything but old. I figured out that when I was six or seven years old, she was about 57 - my age!
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Labels: aging
29 Comments:
you are old - but I still love ya
Ryan
I AM 76 AND I LOOK LIKE I AM ABOUT EARLY 60S , SO PEOPLE TELL ME.
GOOD HEALTH IS MORE IMPORTANT!!
RUTH
I just turned 50, and started going through menopause (although I prefer to call it menodisrupt). People tell me that I look like I'm in my late 30's to early 40's. I guess Mom was right - eat right, excercize, drink water and go to church!
Thanks Mom!
OH Crap I've turned into my dad.hee hee hee
I understand...I was on the other end of your trying to look older. I was told about the 'birds and bees' when I was 8, because I was so developed, my mom thought I might start my period anytime...it waited 2 years, but still, getting it at 10 (16 years ago) was extremely young. I was the only one I knew who had to worry about it for 4 years! At 13, I was dressed up for a wedding (pale lipstick, no other make-up, but hair curled and in a nice dress), and the bride's neice thought I was her age...23. I'm only 26, and I now think I look my age, but I HATE getting called ma'am. It's ridiculous! You're right about wanting to beat the little teenager behind the counter...
As for hormones in the food and such, I don't know. My mom was 35 when she had me, and I don't think they were putting that many hormones in the food back then.
And as for having white hair...my dad has a white beard, and his hair is white framing his face (darker around the rest of his head)...but at this time of year, if we're out walking, we constantly hear little kids whisper to their mom's..."Look, it's Santa." My dad used to be offended, but not laughs it off, and even plays along if one of the kids approaches him.
I'M 70 and still working full time, plus we have custody of our 17 year old grandson. when we go shopping, people think we are his parents, and he always says, nope they are my grandparents. of course I feel good about that, but for 30 years, i took alot of vitimans, tried to eat healthly(i am about 20 overweight though) still try to lose. and keeping on the go,
A person can't sit home and watch TV, it drives me nuts.
so a person never grows old, just better.
sonia
I am convinced that daily exercise, eating right, living right, all contribute to looking good "for my age" (62), however...I am also convinced that emotional stress, family problems, worry, ages a person. I can see visible proof that I have aged about 5 years from Jan to Dec in 2008. How do I backtrack?!
Yep, it's not easy getting older! I will be 60 in February and up until a month ago, felt good. Unfortunately, I hurt my left knee and then messed up the right knee to compensate. I have never felt as old as I do now, hobbling around like a wounded moose! Oh well, am going to physical therapy and hope to be back to some type of normal (whatever that is!) Yes, good health is THE most important thing...
Barbara M
if you want to look 10 years younger it's very simple. Shave!
Am 71 and feel like 21. Read about healthful things every day and take Leaf Greens from AIM. My mind is quick and good.
People don't quite look at me the same way anymore though. Ouch!
I am 74 and there many days when I really feel my age, but most days I do good. I also suffer with fibromyalgia, but will not let get the best of me. I know that if I do I will not be active. If you are a wimp, you will not enjoy those "tarnished" golden years. Take each day at a time and make it the best you can. I have been getting gray since my teens and feel that it shows that I know how to live.
I had my first child at 40. and the grandpa comments were constant.They never bothered me.What did bother me was when I was at the park when the kids were young and some one asked if I was baby sitting. I was a single dad. their mother was not involved, and even if I wasn't a single dad the comment was tasteless.Bruce
I am 51, guess I look it, don't know. For a woman I haven't ever been too concerned with my looks. I still feel 25 though.I am not upset about growing older. All my young nieces, nephews & cousins & their friends want to "hang out" with me. That makes me feel good. I believe I feel young because I am interested in and curious about everything.I love life,music, reading,people and most of all....laughing & having fun. Life is too short to worry about a few grey hairs or wrinkles.
I am 62, look as if I'm in my 50's, but appearances don't tell all. I have osteoarthritis in my spine, hands, and feet. But I don't let it stop me from doing things that I like.
After having raised a family, I am once more involved in art, with my goal being to have a one-woman show.
Numbers aren't everything: spirit, attitude, and staying involved in the world around you tell a lot more...
I am75 and there are days I feel it. But there are days when I feel and act like a kid. Trying to get out of a car or get into a truck gives my age away.
All the pills I take also dates me BUT age is relative
and it is what you make it.
ATTITUDE! ATTITUDE!
My dad was 49 when I was born. He was often asked if he was my grandfather. My brothers are ten years older, and there is no doubt that I got the better part of the parenting deal. My dad was more relaxed, affectionate, nurturing, and had time just for me. Their dad was in the throes of providing for a large family, irritable, and always under pressure. His health took a bad hit in his late fifties, and it changed his life and outlook, and thus my teenage years! Old age is certainly not for sissies, but what you lack in energy and physical prowess, you make up for with a certain perspective of a long life! Enjoy the blessings of that!
I am 74 and some days I feel that and more. Most days I feel a lot younger. My husband, who is 76, and I both volunteer at a school in the city where we live. I do kindergarten and he does first grade. I know for both of us it keeps us young at heart, phyically fit and feel great about being able to help the kids that need help. For us its been a god send. Life is to short to worry about how old you look. Stay young at heart.
I am 84 and still out doing things like golf, camping in the outback (pack everything in and out) and traveling, cruise in a couple of months. My hair is not very grey but I am wrinkled and skin spotted. Too much sun and beach time growing up. I hope to keep going for a good while yet to see my great grands grow up and maybe present me with another levelof granchildren. I really think lots of it is how you think of yourself and don't feel sorry for misfortunes that have happened to you.
I think any man with a white beard is going to look old and/or older. I'm an attractive single woman in my early 50's in excellent health, thank goodness. I do notice men and am never attracted to men with white hair on their faces. A clean shave would instantly remove years from their appearance!
I will be 61 in a couple weeks. I have been a ballet student for the past 16 years, pointe work, too! I work-out, do yoga, pilates, and strength training, I'm mostly vegan, the exception being occasional salmon. No dairy.
I am fit, and healthy. 5'4" 111 lbs. I can do anything that I did when in my 20's. And, I feel like a 20 something.
I guess, if you act your age, you may start "looking your age"!
I am 64 and have never had anyone guess me over 50.I've been told I don't look or act my age don't know how a 64 is supposre to act.I enjoy life and i think a lot of aging has to do with the mind.I am comfortable around people who do things and not sit around and complain about how old they are and all the meds their on and how bad they feel.I feel very blessed that the only thing wrong with me is diabetis and it is under control by a pill and diet. My mother is 85 and people think we are sisters.I keep saying I'm not going to get old as long as I can help it.
Old age is not all that bad. It is what you make it!Even though your brain says you can do something, don't believe it! Who cares how old we look, just stay ACTIVE. I was in the grocery business for 32 years, and attribute my good health to the forced ( ! ) exercise. At 76, I feel great and am told I don't look it - and my hair is gray. The main thing that aggravates me is the hands don't have the strength they used to , consequently I sometimes have to call on a neighbor. But - - I'm a survivor. Helen
What's with all these people critizing the white beard? I say it looks distinguished, especially for a doctor (plus sounds like he's married so not really looking to attract!).
I'm 61 and I agree -- being a senior isn't for sissies! I work full time even though I have arthritis and a spinal problem that cannot be corrected. I move a bit slower than I did at 25, but I move. And that's the important thing -- stay physically active.
Lois
I am a 61 year old female and for the past 8 years I have been working out 5 times a week and I firmly believe that exercise slows down the ageing process.
I am often mistaken to be in my middle forties and I have more energy now than I did in my middle 20`s.
I am 72 and had an accident with my car. The Medtech asked me how old I was and when I told him he looked so shocked that I thought he was going to faint. My mother died at 85 but didn't have a wrinkle on her face.
I have a male friend who is 62 but looks ten years older than I. I think it all depends on genes and health. Just forget it and enjoy life.
ShiningMeadow
Our society is so obsessed with looks. Whether we look old or young or our age, it is the quality of life that matters. If we were more concerned about the inner beauty of ourselves and the people around us we could be content with who we are. I agree with Ruth, good health is more important.
I love my husband of 16-yrs., but recently I have noticed that our age difference of 14yrs, me 41 and he is 55. It seem's like we are thinking differently, we use to be so close, I got sick with cancer and he was and is great about it.
But lately he talk's to me like I am his daughter, My Dad is alive , I have no " Daddy " issue's me and my Dad have a great relationship.
Is our age difference just showing more ?? I don't know anymore??
Everyone told me this would happen and of course I don't tell them, is there something I or We can do??
Feeling lost in the East Coast??
I'm guessing that all of a sudden (because of the cancer) he's very concerned about losing you, and he'd be left all alone. My loving husband was in tears at my diagnosis of breast cancer when I was diagnosed. He just knew I was going to die. I told him I wasn't going anywhere! That was 8 yrs ago, and I'm still strong and healthy. I think he needs to be reassured that you, also, aren't going anywhere!
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