New Year's Resolutions

The new year brings with it the promise of things to come and things to be left behind. The problem is that while many people enjoy making New Year's resolutions, they often fail to keep them after just a few weeks. Why is that?

Let's take a look at some of the more popular resolutions. People plan to lose weight, stop smoking, cut back on their drinking, be more conscious about their purchases, be kinder to others, involve themselves in exercise programs and just be better people. All of them are laudable and worth consideration. It's how you go about them that is, as they say, "the devil is in the details."

Want to make New Year's resolutions that work? How about making them more realistic considering what you can and can't do over the long haul? If you want to lose weight, plan to lose a reasonable amount in a week without going on one of the latest fad diets that will fatigue your taste buds and put visions of goodies in your head. A taste of "forbidden foods" can solve that taste bud fatigue for many and help keep them on the straight and narrow.

Exercise, too, is a wonderful resolution because it provides you with so many benefits. For one, it improves your mood, it decreases stress, it helps with cholesterol and glucose management, increases your stamina, muscle tone and decreases weight. But, wait a minute, let me just say a word about weight and exercise.

Women who exercise for weight loss may find that while their clothes are fitting better, they haven't lost as much weight as they thought. It's a function of muscle being heavier than fat tissue, so you will look better and be in better health, but you may not notice your scale plummeting as you would like.

After you've set your New Year's resolutions, how will you make them come to be? It's fine to say I want to learn to be more comfortable in the company of people, but how will you accomplish this? Just like swimming, getting into this particular pool takes small steps toward your goal. Practice on people in stores by asking for directions to where food items are, say "hello" to people waiting for the bus with you or on the train or to the toll collector. Small steps lead to big gains in this area.

So, don't set yourself up for failure with your resolutions. Keep them simple and make an easy plan and then go do it and, please, don't forget to give yourself from time to de-stress on a daily basis.

Related Topics: 7 Secrets to a Healthier New Year
, Family-Sized New Year's Resolutions, New Year's Resolution: Get Fit

Tags: 2006Resolutions, setgoals, WebMD

We Need Parades

Parades were always a part of my life as a young child and I can still remember my mother taking me to every holiday parade there was on the wide avenue that stood just at the foot of a very steep hill in our town. I'd sit on the curb and watch as the uniformed men from the police, fire and military marched by with their bands and bagpipes. Then there'd be the veterans of all those wars in their uniforms or, if the uniform didn't still fit, wearing their ribbons and hats from the local Veterans of Foreign War unit.

The schools would sometimes march and we'd get to see talented marching bands interspersed with huge banners and it would, many times, bring a tear to my eye. I was so filled with emotion watching those parades that it just all welled up and a few tears would fall down my cheeks. Despite the tears, I loved it and I loved my mother for taking me to these celebrations of life and of community.

Structure is something that provides a sense of security in our lives and, for some, it is more necessary for maintaining focus and hope. We send children to structured schools where the curriculum and the uniforms indicate they are places of learning not just of class lessons, but lessons in life and appropriate behavior.

Parades produce that sense of structure in our lives, albeit a physical display of structure only once a year. They are, therefore, something for which we all eagerly await. In New York, it's the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade with its enormous balloons that never fail to dazzle and in New Orleans it's Mardi Gras. Each city has known its own heartache. New York had its 9/11 and The Big Easy was hit by Hurricane Katrina. Both cities needed to hang on to their traditional parades, but New Orleans may have a harder time than New York.

What value is there in a parade, you may ask. It's just foolishness and money that could have been better spent on food or medicine or housing for the homeless, but the necessities of life aren't always enough to help us survive.

I recall a very famous study that was done in upper New York State just after WWII. Rene Spitz looked at infant mortality in orphanages and, although the children were cared for in terms of food, medicine and a clean living environment, they had a very high mortality rate. This was especially true in the very young.

Why was this, Spitz asked himself. What was the one thing missing here that could save them? He found it was love, a sense of bonding and physically touching other human beings. So, parades seem to me to provide that social glue that helps all of us survive the day-to-day cares of the world. Fun, frivolity and laughing are just as important as food, medicine and a home.

Beneath the frivolity of parades is a very real life necessity, but who would have thought that?

Related Topics: Beat Holiday Stress, Blow Off Post-Holiday Blues

Tags: parades,mardi gras,anxiety,stress,webmd

SAD: Seeing the Light

Anxiety, as I've said before, is one of the "ugly twins" and its twin is depression. Both, it appears may be affected by our exposure to sunlight and this has proven to be an important key to treatment of a particular problem, Seasonal Affective Disorder or SAD. While I'm glad to see that specialized lights can provide relief for some patients with this disorder, I wondered if the researchers should be studying the effects of sunlight or specialized lights on anxiety.

If serotonin is the neurotransmitter involved in depression and SSRI meds are used for both depression and panic disorder, a form of anxiety, doesn't it seem logical that researchers should be evaluating anxiety or panic and light therapy?

In fact, to satisfy myself, I did a search on "serotonin and anxiety" and found 3,746 citations in the professional literature on PubMed. So, what about studies of light therapy and anxiety, I thought?

A team of researchers at Baker Heart Research Institute in Melbourne, Australia (The Lancet, Dec. 7, 2002, p. 1840) found that serotonin levels plummeted in the brains of research subjects between June and August (which corresponds to Australia's winter). Also, serotonin levels "were higher on bright days no matter what the time of year..."

I wasn't interested in how mice or other animals responded to light therapy because not everything translates directly into human use, so I skipped those studies. We know that birds have a special light sensor in the front of their heads that tells them when it's time to migrate. We have a similar structure, but we don't migrate and corporate America and everyone else is very happy about that.

Most studies dealt with depression of the SAD type or other, including PMS, where light therapy was considered something to be explored (Journal of. Clinical Psychiatry, 2000; 61 Suppl 12:22-7). An article in the Journal of Affective Disorders, 1994, June: 31(2): 75-80, found that there was seasonality in panic disorder and suggested that light therapy might be an effective treatment for some patients.

So, is light therapy something to be further explored for those with anxiety and panic in addition to depression? The research seems to be looking in that direction, but we need more evidence.

Related Topics: How Light Therapy Works, Unraveling the Sun's Role in Depression

Tags: anxiety,depression,light therapy,panic,seasonal affective disorder

Dear Difficult Computer

I saw a TV show the other day and the main character, who was supposed to be an MD, said that all of us will get Alzheimer's Disease. All of us? If you heard that, how would you feel? I was very annoyed that someone would be so cavalier with dialog that they'd put a line like that in a script. What would it do if not make many of us feel stressed?

Well, he's wrong and I won't go into the particulars because I have something that I know is sure to protect me from Alzheimer's-my computer. How is it going to do it? My computer is a constant source of irritation for me, but that's a good thing. It causes me to learn how to undo all the little blips that that demon living in the hard drive cooks up.

Today, it refused to recognize that I had a CD drive, so I had to go on the internet to find a solution and, sure enough, there was a kind soul who had the same problem and his solution fixed my computer. Then, it refused to recognize one of the hard drives in my computer. Yes, this particular computer has three of them because it's used for my new love; short, short films. I had to go to the manufacturer's site and download new drivers because new software I had loaded on my computer had corrupted the drivers for this drive.

Is it fixed? No, because I have to carefully follow the instructions for the diagnostic that has to be run so I can let it tell me that there's really one of their drives on my computer. Next, the graphics card's drivers acted up and it just kept getting more complicated.

I used my usual approach to things like this. I get what I need, put it all together and leave it there while I go off and read a wonderful book, watch a DVD or go for a walk. I won't let it get me upset. Sooner or later, I'll get it figured out and we'll go on until the next time my computer/demon acts up and I'll find a solution then, too. If I know one thing from this computer it's that it will always challenge me and in that challenge will be the exercise that my brain needs to help me fight off Alzheimer's. So, this is a good kind of stress because I choose to see it that way.

All of this wrangling with computers has led to something else. I am now the computer maven where I consult and I have to teach the MDs how to solve their computer problems. Not only that, but I have two monitors on my computer there because I've been designated the "test" case to help them figure out how it will work when everyone has two monitors on their computers.

So, computers are both a joy and a health benefit, but they sure can be stressful if you let them.

Related Topics: Avoid Desktop Stress, You and Your Computer: Fight Fear Together, Boost Your Memory

Tags: computers, repair, frustration

The Fluffy Therapist

Pets are stress reducers and anyone who has ever owned a dog or a cat or a parrot, as the mother of a friend of mine, knows that they are great companions and they give love and affection at little cost. The subject of how pets can be used in therapy has been a topic of discussion over the past decade and I've seen in hospitals and nursing homes how the visit of a dog, a rabbit, or a cat can bring smiles and affectionate touches from people who seemed unreachable.

I remember visiting a hospital many years ago where they had a separate building for those who were considered particularly violent and I was somewhat hesitant to go in. The staff member assured me that it wasn't as I might have expected because they now had a dog in residence and things had changed. Sure enough, I entered the building and was greeted by a brown and white dog of uncertain breed that waved her fluffy tail at me and almost smiled in welcome. She was the most important staff member on that ward to the patients.

I came across a recent program where psychology students will be receiving hands-on instruction in preparing dogs in shelters for retraining as therapy dogs in community settings. The stress in these shelters can bring out behaviors that have unfortunate results and "man's best friend," we know, needs help with stress reduction.

Thinking about it, I remembered someone telling me that each evening when she returned home, her cat attacked her legs. This particularly inhospitable behavior was getting on her nerves and her friends were afraid to come near the apartment. What to do? I asked her if the cat were alone all day. She said it was and I asked her how would she feel if she were kept alone in an apartment with no company and nothing to do all day. She said she’d "go nuts." "Well," I said, "do you think your cat would like a little company?" Within a month, she had another cat in residence and the first cat became a different animal entirely. No more ankle attacks, no more lying in wait to jump on people.

Pets can be good for your health. A recent study of stress and cholesterol levels found an important relationship in that higher levels of "bad cholesterol" (LDL) can go up to levels three times greater over time if stress is high initially and little is done to reduce it. Pets lower stress levels, so, in a way, they are wonderful for our cardiac and mental health.

The main thing to consider, however, is where your pet has been before you've gotten it. I had a discussion with a veterinarian who told me of problems he has encountered in his practice when a pet from a "puppy mill" is brought in for care. One thing the owners say proudly, many times, is "My dog comes from (names a European country)." He then informs them that that country is notorious for its puppy mills and they've got a sick animal on their hands.

A bit of careful research will be very helpful if you decide a pet is in your future. At all cost, avoid those from "mills" because it's not fair to the animal or to you, especially if you're getting it for stress reduction. How stressed would you be to find you've gotten a puppy with major health or behavioral problems? A word to the wise.

Related Topics: Lives Brightened By Doggie Dynamics, Pets: Healing with Love

Tags: pets,healing,stress,therapy

Creativity and You

Creativity is something which has always interested me and I've been drawing and painting and, now, taking photographs since I was about eight. It has always provided a sense of calm, joy and attuned my eye to look at things in a different way.

At six, I first noticed that ants moved their nests in long lines where some ants carried ant eggs while others seems to bring bits of earth or leaves. I marveled at their intensity and how they labored all day long to move their nest. Today, if I happened to come across that, I'd shoot some video because the ant is one of nature's wonders. They are incredibly strong for their size and they work in such wonderful team efforts that they can be an inspiration to all of us. The one thing they lack, I believe, is creativity, but I could be wrong.

How do we teach our children and ourselves to be creative? It's something that will serve both child and adult in so many ways during their lives that I looked a few blogs on the internet and found there are blogs on creativity in higher education, marketing, employee creativity and there's even a "creativity lab." I suggest that you explore some of these sites, as I will, in the weeks to come. I intend to see if I can enrich my own creativity because, in that way, I keep learning and it's lifelong learning that keeps our minds limber and our outlook fresh, even in trying times.

Let me hear how your explorations in creativity progress. I'll be interested in hearing what you discover.

Related Topics: The Healing Art, Smart Toys

Tags: art,photography,creativity

Knitting for Charity

One of my favorite expressions is "good from bad" and I always try to keep that in mind. A bad thing is when someone is sick or homebound or is so anxious that they need to keep busy all the time just to maintain their grip on the anxiety. A good thing would be to put that time to use and, in the process, help yourself and someone else.

With this thought in mind, I began looking at blogs related to charitable work that anyone can do and which would serve both purposes stated previously. I came across a truly interesting site called Knitting for Charity. The woman who runs the site offers free knitting instructions for charitable knitting projects as well as ideas about using yarn you didn't even realize you had.

Another blog I visited was Charity Christmas cards, The Cancer Blog where they have a number of great ideas to help you participate in charitable efforts and give the gift of hope to others. They linked me to a site called Cheap Therapy and I definitely liked that one. Making something to show you care for someone else is, to my mind, a better gift than something that can be bought in a store. Buying gifts isn't really giving anything other than something like a money exchange. There's nothing of you in the gift.

Then there's 25 Things for Charity where the group has asked for a self-commitment of making something for charity in the next 12 months. As the site indicates, there are no rules and quotes Thomas Edison as having said, "Hell, there are no rules here-we're trying to accomplish something." What a great idea and they invite you to check in and let them know your progress and what you've decided to make or have made already. Truly a charitable effort that lasts all year long and provides the benefits for much longer than that, I'm sure.

Do you think that people deserve to be rewarded for their charitable works in some way? I don't mean that they should receive money or cars or whatever, but something that permits them to carry on their good work or to increase it. Strengthen the Good uses the power of blogs to communicate about special people like Susan Tom, an adoptive mother of 11 special needs children who was given a new home by Extreme Makeover Home Edition. Wonder how many bedrooms there are now and how many more Susan will need.

Homes are a wonderful "gift" for anyone and one of my favorite charities has to be Habitat for Humanity where everyone pitches in to build homes for needy families in communities around the world. What more could you want: good people, good work, physical exercise and an incredible sense of accomplishment all rolled up into one neat package.

I do consider charity to be therapy because it allows us to help those in need. What we get in return is far more than we will ever give, so if you've got some time on your hands and you'd like to quell that anxiety or tone down that stress, see what you can do.

Related Topics: Shake Holiday Gift Anxiety, Survive the Holidays After the Loss of a Loved One

Pain and Anxiety

Pain has the ability to rob people of life's enjoyment, to disrupt relationships, cause career disturbances and generally leave someone in a depressed state of mind. Often, physicians try to alleviate chronic pain with medications that may be sedating or have side effects that make them trade-offs in terms of what can happen with long-term use.

The incidence of pain is of such concern that new attention is being paid to it as we see the growth of pain management centers and healthcare professionals trained to work with pain patients. Even psychologists have been brought into this area of healthcare because a strong relationship has been found between two things: anticipation of pain because of lack of control of pain medication and anxiety related to pain.

Since higher levels of anxiety appear to be related to the experience of more pain, relaxation techniques are being increasingly used to lower anxiety levels and, thereby, lower pain. Studies of pain as it related to patient control over pain have also proven that when a patient is responsible for their pain medication, they use less of it than when professionals are responsible. I've seen this myself in surgical patients who were given control over a pump that provided pain medication. The patient could pump the medication at will, within limits, and did require less medication.

Remember, when a patient anticipates the pain that will come when the medication wears off in three to four hours, unless an analgesic patch is used, they begin to have increasing levels of anticipatory anxiety. This, then, feeds back to the muscles and an increase in tension may be the culprit here.

So, for adequate pain relief, at all levels, I believe that patients deserve to be treated with relaxation techniques of any type, be it biofeedback, self-hypnosis, relaxation breathing or whatever works for them. It is the only way to treat pain patients in a humane way.

Related Topics:
Study: Treat Depression, Pain, Separately, Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy for Pain Management

Facing Fear: My Audition

Job interviews, going to parties with a new group of people, auditions, all of these require your ability to handle anxiety. Performance anxiety or anticipatory anxiety are two types of anxiety that come into play here.

Performance anxiety is, of course, having to do something, like a policeman I knew who was a dart throwing champion. He had won an incredible number of awards and I never knew he was a champion until he asked my help one day. We were acquaintances through some work we both did and so he felt comfortable enough to tell me his problem. Each time he stepped up to the line to throw his dart, he froze. What could he do? Well, sports psychology isn't my area of specialization, but I did know of a well-known psychologist close by and I gave him a call. I asked if he'd help my friend with his sports performance anxiety. He did and they used a combination of relaxation and imagery to overcome it.

Anticipatory anxiety usually comes to play when you have been through something rather unpleasant, such as a painful dental extraction or other procedure or rather difficult exam for a promotion or entrance into a school. You conjure up the anxiety you felt and it can cripple you when you most need all your abilities. It can also stop you from getting what you need.

Last night, I decided to do something I've never done before; audition for a commercial. The reason I decided to go was that I believed in the topic the commercials would address and they wanted "people with unusual professions." How unusual is psychology? Well, I don't think many psychologists are running out to auditions even in this age of managed care.

I found myself ("You'll be the last interview of the day.") seated with three others in a large room with a tin ceiling in a building with no elevator. Well, I told myself, you believe in this and this is what you have to do. One of the people waiting for an interview had spiked blond and red hair, coal black circles around her eyes and wore an outfit that looked like something out of a music video. The other two were just plain folks.

Did I feel anxious? Not at that moment, but I had some pangs during the day and I managed to push them away by telling myself that I was doing this by my own free will, I would have fun doing it (I've actually enjoyed taking tests for school entrance) and it would be over in an hour. So, I filled out the forms, watched the people and waited until everyone else had gone down the corridor, remained for five minutes and been shown the door. "You're next," the young woman said.

I was led down the corridor, shown into a brightly lit room and asked to sit in a small chair against a blank wall. I saw the video camera aimed at me from an angle to my right. The interviewers were delightful and we talked on and on. I guess I took about a half-hour and then it was done. I felt really good. It didn't matter whether I got to be in the commercial or not because I found it to be fun to talk about this subject. They seemed to like it too because they laughed and smiled and never once indicated it was time for me to go.

So, it worked out well either way and my attitude played a big part in it. They saw it and I felt it. It was an attitude of calm and ease and that's what you need to aim for next time you have an exam, an interview or whatever. Oh, one last thing. I did Google them beforehand, so I knew a lot about them. Always a good idea to get as much information as you can on whatever faces you.

Related Links: Fighting Fear, Trump Stress With Your Thoughts

John Lennon Remembered

John Lennon was murdered by Mark David Chapman, an obsessed fan, in front of his apartment building in NYC 25 years ago. It doesn't seem that long ago, but it is and I can remember when I met him and Yoko in Toronto.

I was never a Beatles fan, I must say from the start, but I was in Canada, staying at the same hotel when one of those incredible whims hit me. He had just published a book, I was working for a trade magazine and I might get an interview. How much chutzpah can one have?

Never thinking twice, I picked up the house phone, called his room and got one of his close associates. I explained what I wanted, a private interview, and he said he'd get back to me. Being a native New Yorker, I thought that was as likely as snow falling in June, but I figured I'd try anyway.

My phone rang back and they asked if I could come up to the suite at 4 PM and I said, "Sure, may I bring a photographer?" They said I could. Now my problem became getting a photographer in a city where I knew no one and this photog had to keep quiet about where he was going. He also had to believe I was not out of my mind and this was some kind of crank call. He agreed to my demands, no telling anyone, just meet me in the lobby at 3:30 PM.

Yes, I got the interview and I have to say that John Lennon was one of the most pleasant, gracious people I've ever had the good fortunate to meet. Forget the fact that he was fabulously wealthy, world renowned and didn't need anyone like me. He was wonderful and I spent about 45 minutes with the two of them as the photog took candid shots all over the place.

Today, he's gone but his message of serenity and peace lives on with a new generation who is beginning to know him through his music. I still have the proof sheet of photos to prove I really did meet him in person and in private.

Related Topics: Age of (Even More) Anxiety, Introduction to Yoga

Tags: John Lennon,beatles

Jobs and Emotional Distance

Most of us work because we need to work in order to support ourselves and we also work because work provides us with some sense of self-satisfaction and/or importance. What's the first question you are asked when you meet someone (outside of "where do you live?")? It's usually, "What do you do?" Work, therefore, has an important place in our world.

Medical professionals, too, want to see themselves through their jobs. I was reading one of this weeks' Grand Rounds features on how much emotion we should show on the job, or if we should show it, and it started me thinking.

The author talked about a study that appeared to indicate that employers don't want their employees showing emotion. The study seemed to indicate that negative emotions should, in fact, be hidden. This just doesn't make any sense to me as a psychologist but I began to look at how mental health professionals handle emotion on the job.

First, of all, do they love their jobs and love what they're doing? I've met some who are truly wonderful people who are, as the expression goes, the salt of the earth. They work for their patients and, even in the most difficult of situations, advocate for them. It is often a draining task, but they tell me that they love what they do because they help people.

Helping people, granted, is a wonderful job. In medicine and in psychology, many of us are not taught how to deal with emotion, unless it is inappropriate emotion. We get the idea that we must be a blank, "professional" slate on which nothing is reflected. I suppose this is in the service of helping us to deal with difficult situations.

I've talked to psychiatrists and psychologists who have had patients who went through horrendous things and it took a toll on them. They don't often admit to their feelings, even to themselves. I've even talked to two oncologists who are wonderful people and maintain their joy despite the dreaded disease they fight on a daily basis. They are not afraid to express their joy, their frustration and their anger, when appropriate.

Thinking back, I recall one oncologist, in particular, who affirmed for me the standard that should be set for medical professionals. He was a youngish man in his 30s and he was treating my mother for terminal cancer. This man came to my mother's hospital room and sat and fed her lunch when she couldn't sit up to eat. He talked with encouragement and smiled and laughed and made all of us feel he really cared for my mother as a person and for my family and our pain. God bless him wherever he is today.

Related Topics: Anger Management, Managing Job Stress

Random Acts of Kindness

I met a truly wonderful woman recently. She may not know it, but I think she's special and, although I will never see her again, she has affirmed my belief, once again, in the basic goodness of people.

Standing in line in a department store waiting to pay for my purchases, I was asked if I had a "gift card," to which I replied a strained, "No?" This woman, who was getting her packages together, reached over, held her hand out and offered a folded red-and-white card which said '20% off." She said, "Use it and you'll get 20% off anything you bought. Just give it to me when you're done."

Was I being hoodwinked by some sharp thief or was I the "victim" of a good deed? I took no longer than an eye blink before I offered it to the cashier, who cheerily took 20% off everything in my small pile of items, gave it back to me and I turned to the smiling stranger and told her what I thought.

"You are wonderful. That was so kind of you." She answered, "Have a Merry Christmas." Had I just met Mrs. Claus? Was I being repaid for not passing the Salvation Army bucket and claiming poverty? Hmmmm. Was it one of those random acts of kindness I'd heard of on the internet and seen on bumper stickers? Did it really matter?

She made my evening and I don't know if she knows it, but her thoughtfulness to a stranger will bolster me in my pursuit of kindness toward others. May you have a Very Merry Christmas, kind stranger, and may your New Year bring many random acts of kindness your way.

Related Topics: Kindness is Contagious, The Science of Good Deeds, Attitude of Gratitude

Photos and Diabetes

Photos can be more valuable than you think, especially when it comes to helping you maintain your resolve to stay on a diet.

I'm often asked about specific ways to stay the course when there's real medical considerations that require diet restriction. This is especially true in the case of anyone who has a diagnosis of diabetes.

Diabetes, as most of the autoimmune disorders, is especially sensitive to any increase in stress and requires careful adherence to a diet, weight control and exercise. How do you do it?

I've seen a number of patients who have had diabetes and some of them have either had amputations of the toes or feet or serious eye problems as a result of this destructive disease's course. Thinking about how anyone who hasn't come to this state of the disease might remain healthy and whole, I decided on one thing that would be very helpful-your camera.

Digital photography has made it possible for all of us to take a photo and print it right after we've taken it. Graphic reminders can help and I've come up with one for the diabetic and the dieter.

Diabetic patients should take a photo of their feet, print it with the words, "I'm doing this for my feet because I want to keep them," and paste it on the refrigerator door. If that doesn't work, there's a serious problem.



Related Topics: Diabetes Diet, Diabetes and the Holidays