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Etiquette and Social Anxiety
There aren't classes in etiquette anymore, unless you are attending one of the super high-priced "finishing" schools dedicated to the rich and the nouveau riche. No longer do children learn the rules of social behavior or proper dress as they once did. Now, they learn, as we psychologists say, vicariously, meaning they learn by watching. Much of the watching may be of adults in their life or on TV or in films or even video games. So, the potential for learning is rich, but the downside is that they can also learn to be afraid and develop anxiety disorders.
When you were a child, what was one of the first things you learned to do with regard to significant others in your life? For instance, your mother and how she reacted to what you were doing? Wasn't there some signal that you looked for before you continued? I'll bet it was her expression and that's one of the ways anxiety reinforces our behavior.
I watched a little boy put his hand in a decorative planter that had lots of small, white pebbles in the pot. He reached out, scooped up a handful of the pebbles and flung them across the room. In almost the same instant, he turned around to look up at his mother's face. Was she finding it funny or would there be consequences he wouldn't like? The look told everything and, since he didn't see anger, he proceeded to do it again and then he was told to stop. Of course, now he didn't want to stop and the struggle began.
Some adults are now being seen as either super-sensitive to facial cues or just plain super sensitive. At least that's what a study by an Indiana professor found. He said that "highly anxious people tended to judge the change in facial expressions faster than less-anxious people." Okay, doc, but how did they get that way? We know that some people seem more sensitive to facial cues than others. I contend that it's how we've been raised and, sometimes, our training has been overly intense in this respect.
I wonder what he would conclude if he were confronted by a different culture where looking at someone's face is seen as impolite.
Related Topics: WebMD Video: Too Scared: A Tale of Social Anxiety, Best Ways to Ease Anxiety Disorders
Technorati Tags: social anxiety disorder, SAD
When you were a child, what was one of the first things you learned to do with regard to significant others in your life? For instance, your mother and how she reacted to what you were doing? Wasn't there some signal that you looked for before you continued? I'll bet it was her expression and that's one of the ways anxiety reinforces our behavior.
I watched a little boy put his hand in a decorative planter that had lots of small, white pebbles in the pot. He reached out, scooped up a handful of the pebbles and flung them across the room. In almost the same instant, he turned around to look up at his mother's face. Was she finding it funny or would there be consequences he wouldn't like? The look told everything and, since he didn't see anger, he proceeded to do it again and then he was told to stop. Of course, now he didn't want to stop and the struggle began.
Some adults are now being seen as either super-sensitive to facial cues or just plain super sensitive. At least that's what a study by an Indiana professor found. He said that "highly anxious people tended to judge the change in facial expressions faster than less-anxious people." Okay, doc, but how did they get that way? We know that some people seem more sensitive to facial cues than others. I contend that it's how we've been raised and, sometimes, our training has been overly intense in this respect.
I wonder what he would conclude if he were confronted by a different culture where looking at someone's face is seen as impolite.
Related Topics: WebMD Video: Too Scared: A Tale of Social Anxiety, Best Ways to Ease Anxiety Disorders
Technorati Tags: social anxiety disorder, SAD
