Fear and Phobias 2: Agoraphobia
Agoraphobia, a word that come from a Greek word that actually means fear of open spaces such as the market, or agora. This fear involves intense fear and avoidance of any place or situation where escape might be difficult or help unavailable in the event of developing sudden panic-like symptoms. Current estimates are that 3.2 million American, or about 2.2 percent, may have this phobia; however, it is difficult to know just how many people suffer from it because they may not come to the attention of health care professionals.
People who suffer from this phobia may find it extremely difficult to leave their homes to shop, attend entertainment or sports events, keep medical appointments, or pursue education or a career. They are, quite literally, prisoners in their own homes. For many people, this phobia may have been precipitated by a panic attack in some place away from their home. The panic induces the fear and the fear is attached to whatever place the attack took place.
This phobia may start in childhood or even older adulthood and seems to be more prevalent in women than men. Risk factors include genetic predisposition, anxious personality, stress, and substance abuse.
The treatment for this phobia, as it is for many of the others, is medication, if needed, and cognitive therapy to learn new coping mechanisms, relaxation techniques and how to change your life style to help you cope better. Desensitization techniques are also part of the therapy to help the person gradually learn to re-enter the world without fear.
Related Topics: Technorati Tags: agoraphobia, phobia, panic attack, health and wellness
People who suffer from this phobia may find it extremely difficult to leave their homes to shop, attend entertainment or sports events, keep medical appointments, or pursue education or a career. They are, quite literally, prisoners in their own homes. For many people, this phobia may have been precipitated by a panic attack in some place away from their home. The panic induces the fear and the fear is attached to whatever place the attack took place.
This phobia may start in childhood or even older adulthood and seems to be more prevalent in women than men. Risk factors include genetic predisposition, anxious personality, stress, and substance abuse.
The treatment for this phobia, as it is for many of the others, is medication, if needed, and cognitive therapy to learn new coping mechanisms, relaxation techniques and how to change your life style to help you cope better. Desensitization techniques are also part of the therapy to help the person gradually learn to re-enter the world without fear.
Related Topics: Technorati Tags: agoraphobia, phobia, panic attack, health and wellness
65 Comments:
I am 58 years old and have suffered from anxiety and panic attacks since I was 20 years old. I have been to many phychiatrist and psychologist and taken a wide variety of medication. I have been on welbutrin and klonopin for over 10 years now. A panic attack is the worst and scariest feeling that only those that have had them can understand what your mind and body goes through when it happens. Mine can be brought on from something good or bad happening in my life. Any change in my life can trigger an attack. I have had to go to the hospital many times and get a shot to reduce the attacks because the feeling of doom and death is so strong that my blood pressure goes dangerously high. I have had so much negative situations to happen in my life to cause these attacks. I spent 2 weeks in the hospital psychiatric ward when I was in my 30's. If I had someone to guide me, I could write a book on this subject and how it has taken over the majority of my life and made me a slave to this disorder. I had one last week and another this week. I got through both of them by having family or friends sit with me and talk to help me get my mind off of it. I would do my breathing exercise. I once could walk, jump around or exercise to expel some energy. I can't do that anymore. I am disabled now with neuropathy, osteoarthritis and fibromyalgia. I have had spine surgery. My inability to expel this negative energy is crippling within itself. I need to lose 100 pounds but don't even know how to go about it due to my inability to exercise. I already have a very slow thyroid function and take synthroid everyday. As bad as my pain is in my body, I would rather deal with that than with an anxiety attack. I hope somebody reads this and that it helps someone to know that they are not alone. I have heard it all from family, friends, and even doctors back when I began my fight with anxiety and panic attacks, it is all in my head they would say, just snap out of it. They all had answers but had no idea what terror I was living with and still live with today.
Sandra, I understand what you are going through. I am having panic attacks since I became a widow 28 years ago. A few months ago I thought I had got over them, but in the last month I have had them twice again. Despite psychologic therapy they stay with me and dominate may life. I stop doing things I would like to do many times because I fear the fear, which makes me furious. They say we have to confront the panic, tell it that it will not win, that we are stronger than it and they also tell us, that if we just let it wash over us, it inevitably will go away, we should not oppose it, but go with it. Well, I for one, when I feel the first sings of it swallow a pill as fast as I can which helps, but it leaves me feeling down till the next day. You are not alone, I am not alone, knowing that helps a little. Love, Farawaylady
I am a 27 year old mother of five children and I have to say panic attacks have taken over my life in the last 5 years. I just cling to hope that some day I will find a way to get over them because I want to be the mother my children need and I want to do the things with my children they enjoy doing right now my husband does most of the outside of the home things and I hate it is just not fair. But it is nice to know I am not alone.
My generelised social phobia began when I was about 14/15, went to general practicinor who gave me Seroxat (known in the USA as Paxil) what did not work, have asked for benzodiazepines, would not give to me so I resorted to taking cannabis (you can get it legally in The Netherlands), it helped for a moment of time but then it made it worse so I resorted to cocaine(snorting it helped me perfectly only it is very expensive and you do not always get what you where thinking of but after about three years I started to base cooked cocaine even that I could keep under control about two years but then I lost control over it), did not sleep anymore or very less wich caused that I frequently was late for work and drove a lot of accidences on the road during my work(Iwas courier at the time), lost my yob and my friends and therafter I was totally out of control with my abuse and at a moment I was using five grams of basecoke a day, almost 24 hours a day till the day my bank blokked all of my accounts because of a guilt for more then 20.000 euro. Result I had to stop cold turkey from using 5 grams a day and kept kleen for about 4 months then I was taking it again (first weekends but gradualy more and more). Have myself letting committed to a addiction center (who have no idea how to stop using, not one of the helpers was ever addictive of any substance so how should they know what it is to be addictive and how to treat it by the way Ihad still my Generelised social phobia but I did not get one benzo because of its addictivenis,but did get buspiron what made me feel even worse). I fell off the wagon 2 times during my "treatment" and about a month thereafter.Thenm got guided living still no benzo's(The psychiater said to me if you want them go buy them on the street -unexplaneble-,came back in drugscene and had haved severable times a return to base).Then went to psychiatrical hospital to get them, but also the pushed me SSRI'S to my throat, wich I did not take because it makes me feels worse and the Seroxat(Paxil) had gave me epilepsy,wich stopped when I stoppped taking them.And know after 15/16 years later living in a hell and moving heaven and hell I finally got my Valium(diazepam and Rivotril(clonazepam).So I would like to tell this socalled expert who whrote this article about social fobia and medicines she recommends(SSRI's) that she has noclue what she is talking about! Benzodiazepines are addictive but for the rest completely safe with almost no side effects and I feel myself for the first time in 15/16 years stressfree and I don't give a damn that I have to use them the rest of my live!!!!!!!!!!!!!. So miss expert think twice before you go recommending anything else but benzodiazepines against anxiety/phobia, you have read what you cause(and this is just a summary of what I have bin through thanks to whitholding the right medication).I hope you do something with my story, but I think you keep holding on your way of practicining stubberd as all your specialists are.Someone from Holland who knows what he is talking about.
Just wanted some info on ptsd such as: is it normal for this to reoccur some 35 or 40 years after the fact? Didn't realize that I'd suffered from this for years after Nam, and now it's getting worse. Getting to the point that it's hard to sleep at night(don't feel safe). Literally haunted by dreams, seeing faces in dreams some long dead. Afraid to talk to the VA, because they had me locked down and taking thorazine 4Xdaily before, because of someone telling a lie about me. Get treatment at the VA- 100% disability. I am so physically disabled that I am no threat to anybody, just want to live unmedicated and in PEACE.
thank god, i finally saw a program called panic on HBO/showtime, and it describes this nightmare to a "T". Its hard to make anyone understand this. Earl Campbell, Michelle Pfeiffer, and other big names suffer(ed) from this affliction, it is truly devastating. there is no getting around it either at the onset, you are right to say, only the people that have these things understand what it is, and how much fear it instills in the person afflicted.
johnny de la zerda
sweetbear78147@yahoo.com
I've had panic attacks since I was 19 years old and I am now 29. I had just gotten a new job, a new apartment and in a new town and thats when I started having panic attacks. It got so bad that I had to move back to my parents home and I had to quit my job. The panic attacks ruled my life- and I was on Ativan for several years and for every little panic feeling I'd take them. I found a program thru Midwest Center for Stress and Anxiety that helped me get my life back. I can say that I don't have panic attacks anymore but still have periods of anxiety but with the help of the Midwest program I've learned to control it. I thank God that I found this program!
I am 42 years old, and have been diagnosed with PTSD, with anxiety/panic disorder, depression and agoraphobia. It has paralyzed my life. I have been through many traumatic experiences in my life and a recent one has brought them all back to me. I believe I have had panic disorder since a young age, then it went away for while, then came back each time I suffered something traumatizing. Now I am a prisoner in my home. I take more medications than I care to list. Right now I take anxiety medication (Serax), Effexor, xanax, Etolac (because the affliction actually caused me physical pain)and adderal for energy through the day. This is a terrrible affliction that I would not wish on my worst enemy. I can not function as a normal human. I was an Executive in a publically traded technology firm and have now been on disability 7 months. Noone, and I mean NOONE, can imagine what this feels like unless you suffer from it. I try to explain. I can't tell you how many people have told me to "snap" out of it! I can't and am miserable. Therapy 3 times a week, and medication, staying at a treatment center, I have tried it all. I just want to be normal....
signed -K in distress
I believe I have a touch of this. It's not so bad that I never leave the house, but bad enough that I much prefer to stay at home. I only get panic attacks when on a stage, or in situations where everyone else is staring at me.
I AM 34 YEARS OLD I STARTED HAVING PANIC ATTACKS WHEN I WAS 18 YEARS OLD THEY HAVE TAKEN OVER MY FREEDOM OF DOING SIMPLE THINGS THAT NORMAL EVERYDAY PEOPLE DO SUCH AS TAKING TRIPS,GOING PLACES LIKE THE MALL,OR RESTURANTS ALONE,EVEN JUST A SIMPLE DRIVE DOWN THE STREET WITH ME BEHIND THE WHEEL HAS BECOME SO DIFFICULT. I FEEL SO NEGLECTFUL TOWARDS MY CHILDREN BECAUSE WHEN THEY WANT ME TO TAKE THEM PLACES I HAVE TO MAKE AN EXCUSE TO GET OUT OF IT OR ASK SOMEONE ELSE TO TAKE THEM FOR ME WHICH ALWAYS MAKES ME FEEL LIKE THE WORST MOM IN THE WORLD BECAUSE THEY CANNOT TRUELY UNDERSTAND WHAT I GO THROGH WHEN THESE ATTACKS HAPPEN THEY DO TRY TO UNDERSTAND BUT I CAN ALWAYS SEE THE DISAPPOINTMENT IN THEY'RE FACES AND TAKING TRIPS ANYWHERE WITH MY HUSBAND AND HIS WHOLE FAMILY IS UNFATHIMABLE SO MY HUSBAND AND I NEVER GO AND OF COURSE WE ARE ALWAYS THE ONLY ONES TO STAY BEHIND AND I ALWAYS WONDER HOW MUCH MORE OF THIS HE CAN DEAL WITH.ALTHOUGH I'VE BEEN TAKING ZOLOFT AND XANAX FOR 7 YEARS IT HAS HELPED THE ATTACKS TREMENDOUSLY BUT NOT COMPLETLY I HAVE THE HARDEST TIMES DEALING WITH THE PHOBIAS AND I REALLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO HELP MYSELF.I'VE TRIED EMDR BUT IT IS VERY EXPENSIVE AND I JUST CANNOT AFFORD IT ANYMORE.IT DIDN'T HELP TO MUCH ANYWAY.DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY ADVICE TO OFFER CONCERNING WAYS TO OVERCOME PHOBIAS?
Hello to all
I have panic attacks,,not all the time but when i have one it is big and bad...about 2 years ago i was in a car wreck and the panic attacks got kind of bad then...and now i dont feel safe unless i am at home and in my bedroom...i have 5 boys 4 of which is at home...there are times when i cant get out to do anything with them..no doc appointments no school things..i can go outside and sit inmy yard but not for long periods of time...its like when i leave my bedroom room i feel the air being sucke dout of me...and my family they love me but they dont understand..they just think that its something i can get over..i have tried to explain to them how it feels but they stilll think its an excuse or something i can get over...i am not sure were to turn for help...i started to think it was in my head but i have read this and now i know it is not...can u please tell me where to go for help?....i dont like this feeling i dont like to feel that i am a prisoner in my own home...please help....
i just posted about haveing the panic attacks and not leaving my room ....if u have any suggestions please leave them here majesticheart03@yahoo.com
I am a mother of four wonderful children. 3 who have breathing problems I was told I had panic disorder with agoraphobia when I was 20, I am now 27. I was ok at first learned to maintain, but as the years gone bye I stopped going anywhere. I only leave my home if I truly have to. I make myself everyday to go outside and smoke for my childrens sake, but the doctor said I need to stop smoking due to my health, but the problem with that is thats the main reason I go outside at all. My attacks look like I am have seizures. Its very scary. They told me in the beginning I would one day come to a point where I wouldn't ever leave my home, I laughted it off, thought they were full of it. But now I am the person they told me I would become. None of the medications they have put me on works, and I have tried many. So if anyone is going through what I do please help me understand. My oldest children think I don't love them they are 11 and 8 cause I can't go to any of their school things or their games they both played soccer. My husband don't understand it either.
i am fifty three years old and have had panic attacks and anxiety for as long as i can remember. i moved to Ohio amost two years ago and went back to college to continue my medical career. i was referred to a psyciatrist when i first arrived and continued my medication (zanax) i could not complete my fist semester in college because of the inability to conscentrate so i quit my meds' now i can't get a doctor to even prescribe meds' because (quote: we doctors' feel responsable for the drug problem in this area and will not write prescriptions' for such medications as zanax) end quote! I am hurt,angry,and feel abused by the doctors' that neglect lagitamate patients and make them suffer for other peoples' mistakes!. if anyone knows' how i can find treatment please let me know!!!! dallas1127
I am 41 years old. I am going through panic and anxiety myself. I had to quit my job and move in with my boyfriend. I am going through treatment via the Midwest Center for Anxiety and Depression. It does help and uses common sense, but we seem to be unable to see that because of this condition.
I had this problem before and there were a few years when I was fine and not on any medication...I realize at that time, my self esteem was very high. I think this has a lot to do with it.
I am being weaned off xanax now and hope to be able to go without...I was on a very high dosage for a long time and it actually did more harm because of being on it for a couple of years. I started to become more and more depressed. It does help for short periods, but I realized it was making me worse. That is just my opinion...I understand how the medical field views it as being a "drug seeker" if you use it. I worked in an ER and most doctors just don't understand. Since I have a really good therapist and the Midwest Center, I am starting to see an improvement in my way of thinking. That is another problem...we overthink things and become anxious. I am getting there, but still have a ways to go. I am working on my self esteem and changing my negative thoughts to positive.
Recently I ended up in the ER, which brought on more stress because that is where I used to work, with severe chest pains. It was not a panic attack. My heart labs came back abnormal and I had to have a CAT scan of my chest. Just before the CAT scan, I had a major panic attack (one of the worst ever). I was crying hysterically in front of these people and I kept thinking that they would think I was crazy or that I was embarrassing myself. How many of us have had that thought? Anyhow, I made it through and stayed overnight in the hospital for more tests in the morning. I was awake most of the night just thinking and thought I actually made it through one of the worst panic attacks I have ever had and I thought I DON'T CARE WHAT ANYONE THINKS OF ME NOW. I felt better about myself. Sometimes as scary as it is...it was an eye opener, it didn't kill me. And I realized MOST PEOPLE AREN'T THINKING ABOUT YOU, THEY ARE THINKING ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE ARE THINKING ABOUT THEM! AND THE ONES WHO DO THINK OR TALK ABOUT YOU AREN'T WORTH YOUR TIME!!
So Good Luck to all of you. Hope you find what is best for you.
PS Think about this...what would you say to a friend or loved one during a panic attack? You would say kind words...try saying those kind words to yourself. It starts to work.
I am a 39 year old mother of 4 daughters ranging from ages 16, 18, 19, and 22. I was diagnosed seven years ago with Panic/Anxiety disorder but most recently Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I can tell you that this is not an easy illness to deal with. Many would say that it is not an illness and that it's all in my mind and I should just think happy thoughts, relax, exercise and try to do things to take my mind off things. The thing is I have tried all these things and there are times I am feeling happy and great and all of a sudden the fear and phobia's just creep up on me, the anxiousness, the fear of dying, the fear of fainting, the sweating, the confusion, the fear of not knowing how long the attack is going to last, the fear of having a heart attack, the fear of being alone with no one to help me through my attack..the fear..oh the feara! I have a fear of medications even though I am currently on Klonopin and Celexa. This is the first medication that I was prescribed for my disorder and it has helped until recently. I was taken off the Celexa and prescribed other medications to take with the Klonopin, all which made me sick and so I just take the Klonopin and pray it gets me through each time. My thought is that I have been on it too long and it's not as effective anymore. I have also been on medications like Celexa, Prozac, Paxil, Abilify, Zoloft all of which made me so sick I could not function at all. If I wasn't sick from the meds then I felt like I was in a state of euphoria or something out of the ordinary or unreal or nausiated or dizzy and could not function or get out of bed. The worst part is that when I would tell the doctors how the meds would make me feel, they would tell me I wasn't given the medications a chance. I mean who wants to walk around feeling sick. I am already suffering but you want to give me something to make me feel worse. I have a constant fear of medications and being addicted to them. I wish I was one of the stronger women out here who did not require medication and could just get through this with techniques that did not require medication but that did not work for me. I want to get better but it's like everytime a person is prescribed a medication, you eventually hear about or read later that it's not good for you and is being taken off the market. No I would not wish this disorder on anyone. I am not able to go out without fearing an attack and I never go anywhere by myself because I have a fear of having an attack and I don't want to be alone should one come on. I miss out on so many family activities because I confine myself to the house for fear of having an attack and this is causing me to not enjoy life or live a happy and full life. My daughters always invite me to nice places and want me to get out and have a nice time but as much as I push myself the panic interferes. I can't keep a job because I can be at work and feeling happy and next thing you know her comes the fears and the attacks. I pray, I think positive, I do try but nothing seems to work. I believe in God and I never want God to think I don't believe in him but I fear these attacks and I don't want to be this way. I want to be normal and for the doctor's to understand and listen when I say I don't feel well about medications. I mean they are supposed to work with me and hear me and it's like they get upset when I tell them that a certain medication makes me sick when I want to feel better. I know their intention is to help me but they have to know I don't want to feel the way I feel. Sometimes I regret being on medication because I don't know if I will ever be able to live medication free or ever be able to contol or rid these attacks. I can't ride elevators, I can't stand in the middle of the street to cross, I can't go anywhere by myself, when I am alone at home I fear having an attack and being alone, I don't go to beaches or lakes for fear of wanting to jump in, I can't ride in the front seat of a car, I can't walk over a bridge or ride over a bridge, I can't ride in a car along side the edge of the expressway or near water, I can't be in a store because I start feeling closed in, I can't talk on the phone because after a while I feel like the talking overwhelmes me and I just have to hang up and just that send me into panic, I don't eat certain foods or drink certain beverages for fear that they may have interactions. I mean if anyone is reading this, please hear my cries and pray for me because all I want to do is enjoy life, live right, and be the best mother I can. The hardest part is trying to hide it from my daughters for fear that they may worry themselves and I never want them to suffer from what I am suffering from. So for anyone out there who suffers from this illness, you are in my deepest prayers and I hope someday you too will be rid of this. I am praying for blessings for everyone suffering to be relieved and be able to live a happy , healthy and normal life.
I am so glad I found this site!
I have agoraphobia, and although my husband tries to be supportive, he doesn't truely understand. I was able to work as a school bus driver for 14 years. I quit a year ago and it seems that ever since then, I've been slowly getting worse with this disorder. I was able to function well for 14 years. I've suffered on and off with this most of my life. 21 years ago, when my 3rd child was born, I could not even leave the house at all for 2 years. I see most of you say the meds haven't helped or they've made you sick or they only helped for a period of time. That alone has convinced me that I am not going to try any of them again. I do take a low doseage of xnanx to get me through things that I CANNOT get out of, like going to the grocery store, or going to court with my teenage son (another story in itself). But it is just nice to hear that I am not crazy and other people suffer just as much, if not more then I do. Well, not nice to hear, but I do empathize with all of you. If any of you want to email me, my address is TLP8314VR@AOL.COM
I am 48 years old and have been having panic attacks since 2003 right after a car accident which occured on a freeway. It was a four car pile-up and we came in as the last car (my husband, myself, and our two children) and, thank God, none of us were seriously hurt but I started to have anxiety attacks almost immediately afterwards and, sadly, my husband is verbally abusive which does not help my situation. I was amazed that all of you have described my own situation to a T. Its weird though. At first my anxiety only happened if I drove on the freeway and then it happened when I drove locally and then it went mostly away for about a year. Then, within a two year span, I lost 6 close relatives, most of them young, to various causes such as cancer and heart disease, again with no support or sympathy from my husband. Still, in all of this, I managed just fine going to the grocery store or to other social situations until recently...I lost 2 relatives within a 3 month time period and I had an anxiety attack in the grocery store shortly afterwards. Since then I find myself feeling like I am going to have a heart attack the moment I start to approach any grocery store. I force myself to go in because I am a mother and have to feed my family but I can tell you it is a hard task. My knees go all weak, my palms get sweaty and I start to get light-headed and dizzy. I am fighting this tooth and nail though. I don't want to have to take any medication, if possible, so I force myself to go out of the house every day and do something other than the short drive to take my kids back and forth to school. I don't want to give up going out of the house for fear that I won't want to leave the house if I do. I face my panic attacks head on, with dread and fear, but head on and I pray, pray, pray to God for help. I praise God, and myself, when I get through a social situation or grocery shopping. Like some of you said, these anxiety attacks can happen when you least expect them, even when you are happily doing something you enjoy. My best advice to all of you would be to try, as best you can, even little by little, to get out of the house every day, even just to go for a short walk. It won't be easy but I have found, personally, that the more I get out the more I start to get used to it and I still get panic attacks almost every time but I am praying for the day that they go away either completely or at least become something I can manage. Its not easy for me and I'm sure it won't be easy for you but I think its worth a try, don't you? I wish you all the best in life and, especially, peace.
Im 18 years old and i its 6:35am right now. I have been suffering from anxienty attacks for about 5 months now! and they are literly taking over my life. i cant sleep i cant do any normal activites im scared to drive to work for fear that i will have an attack while driving. I have trouble sleeping because i will get an attack out of the blue and sometimes they will last for 2-3 hours...i honestly dont know how much more i can take..im sitting here bawling right now because it seems better then feeling like my whole intire body is numb,that im not even in my body,disjointed i dont know what to do, ive tried these breathing tecniques that everyone is talking about,it works for a bit but then i get a bad thought and im back to where i started. I have had bad health problems since i was 12 right now i have an ulcer and i fear its because of these anxiety attacks? i feel like im destroying my body. i just want this to go away, i want to feel normal i would take puking,a fever anything over this..atleast i know that ill stop puking lately i feel like ill never stop having anxiety attacks...plz someone help me cope with this:( klove
i have had panic attacks for as long as i can remember but in the past few years i have been agoraphobic and cannot leave the house. My poor husband has to do all the food shopping and i'm tired of trying to explain to my family members why i cant go to the functions. i want to be able to take my daughter to the zoo and the park. I tried several medications and i even bought the midwest center attacking anxiety program but i am still stuck in my house and i want to go back to school and work and show my daughter living this way isnt normal since genetically she is already screwed by this. i worry most about my stomach and bathroom issues and of course having a panic attack when im away from home or around people. If anyone has any suggestions please please contact me amberlynn811@comcast.net
I started having panic attacks when I was living in Ireland and had to ride crowded buses and fly on airplanes to and from the USA. Klodapin works for me, but at times I have to up the dose, when I know I going to an event or gathering were I feel I cannot get out of. In the summer when its more sunny and there is more to do, I have less and less feelings of panic, and I can even stop the doses during this time. It maybe more of a type of mild depression in the winter....any thoughts..?
I too am glad that I found this site. I am 28 years old and I suffer from Panic/Anxiety attacks as well. I lost my Father when I was 23 to a sudden Massive Heart Attack and I actually was doing fine until I got pregnant with my first child at age 24. It was exactly 6 months after the passing of my father. Once I had my son I suffered from Post Partum Depression or so that's what they said I had. I've been on Just about every anti-depresant and I have been on Valium and Klonapin. I am currently taking Xanax and Lexapro. I am dealing okay on these medications but now want to have another baby. My Gynecologist plainly told me I should not get pregnant while taking these medications. So, I am at a loss. Do I suffer terribly with Panic attacks or work my way off the medication and try to have another baby. And if I have severe Panic Attacks while being pregnant wouldn't that harm the baby? It's a confusing situation to be in. Never knowing when the attack is going to come. I too feel the phobia's. I don't want to leave my home which is totally unfair to my 4 year old son. I am afraid to drive. I am afraid of the dark and the worst is being alone. Everyone tries to tell me I just need a break and wants to babysit my son. Well, he may be only 4 years old but atleast I don't feel alone when he is here. It's hard to explain to Friends and Family the feelings that you have while having these attacks. And even when you aren't having an attack you are constantly worrying about when the next one will come. So you live every day of your life is some state of worry. This is really no way to have to live you life. And I too have tried the breathing techniques or focusing on a Solid Object. Nothing helps except taking medications that make you tired and feeling unlike yourself. I too would not even wish this on an enemy. My husband tells me constantly, it's all in your head. But it's not. If it was just in our head wouldn't we have the ability to make it stop. I wish all of you the best. I will keep each of you in my prayers.
i recently quit chewing tobacco a month ago and since have been having panic attacks/anxiety, most of the time, mostly when i go to sleep i feel as if i go to sleep something is going to happen to me, i dunno why ifeel this way. Im starting to get over them i na way now, at times i feel as if im a new person. I still kind of have them i stay up til early in the morning and recently have been feeling like i cant feel my head, its not that of a numbness it just feels like i cant think, in a way concentrate, and cant feel whats going on in my head, its like my head feels congested and cant feel anything but thats not what it is i cant really explain it to well but does anyone else feel this way???
hello to everyone....we are all normal....we have aniexty and panic disorder but we can still tell what color the sky is....my name is maria ive been having aniexty since i was 16, im 22 and i have 4 kids....its a handfull..i suffer from this because i used to drugs...but ive been sober since feb 2003....thank god....i have been threw MRI'S's cat scans, blood exams...and everything u cld think about to find out y i feel like this ....i feel dizzy numbness tingling and panic fast heart sweating in my hands and feet heavyness.....i go to every doctor and get heart atrosounds and everything is normal....so i feel crazy....but i have been told i have aniexty/panic and bi polor....i also suffer from broncitis...so imagine either or feels like its going to kill u....im so sad ive been threw alot of things.....and everytime i go threw sumthing else everything goes worst....i even start to think i mite stop going outside sooner or later if i dnt get treated for this mental issues.....i know the scary feeling....the father of my kids stopped working dued to my aniexty...i cannot be alone...im soo serious...it feels like im devasted when im alone ......i feel like he the only one who helps me alot and i know i put all this stress on him cause every time i get them....i isolate myself from my kids.....i feel bad but i hate to let them see me go threw this...im so lost .....i want to speak to any one who feels like this ....i want to help....even though i suffer from these "crazy feelings"...i want to be a support...so feel free to contact me....luvnoone72@yahoo.com
I am 26 years old and have had panic attacks since I was 14 or 15 years old. I never knew what was happening to me, all I knew was that I wasn't right. I felt like I was crazy and all alone in the world. after I had my second child, at the age of 21, the attacks got really bad. nobody understood how I was trying to explain it. My sister told everyone that I was just trying to get attention, which really hurt because then I didn't want to tell anyone about my problem, so I would keep it bottled up and I got to the point where I just broke down crying to my husband and dad. My husband new the whole time I wasn't making it up, and my dad realized it the day I broke down. I couldn't stay at home by myself anymore, affraid I was going to hurt myself and that my kids would see. One day I got so sick of feeling like that because I couldn't sleep or eat and ended up weighing 110 pounds so I made myself go to the Dr. and get medication. I went through 5 or6 kinds and they all made me feel aweful. My father in law saw a commercial for the midwest center of stress and anxiety. I called them that day and ordered the program. I felt so good by week four, that I quit the program, and I did good for a while and it all came back. After a few weeks I started the program again which I never should have quit, because I realized I was just getting to the really good stuff that really helped me.I finished the program and i feel so much better. It does not just take all your problems away but it teaches you how to deal with them and how to control panic attacks. I still have them occasionally but I can control them and make them go away.
MIDWEST CENTER FOR STRESS AND ANXIETY.... I still refer back to my book from time to time
My mom has agoraphobia, i am 25 and she's had it ever since i was born. i have two older brothers, but the specialist she went to said sometimes it happens after a major event in your life like buying a house, which is what she related it to. i can't remember having any vacations with her or even going shopping like mother and daughter usually do. I have always understood and never tried to make her feel bad that I may have missed out on alot of normal youth functions. i understand, and all i can do is encourage her. i remember when she met the first person after her and my dad got divorced and she got alot better. i think this person took her away from some of her problems and was willing to work with her. everytime she went a little farther she got a little better. i think everytime she went a little farther she got comfortable with that distance so the next distance didn't seem so far away, if you have someone you trust and just practice with them a little distance at a time you would be amazed at what you can overcome in just a couple months. me and my mom like to go garage saleing and of course we can only go so far but everytime i go with her i try to get her to go a little farther, only if she is comfortable with it, you never want to push someone just because you are frustrated and don't understand, that will only make them not trust you anymore. its an on going battle but my mom has a heart of gold, she has always been there for me and all of my brothers and sister even though her life is so much more difficult, i can never give up on her, no matter what. i love her more than anything in the whole world, i would be lost without her. NEVER GIVE UP!
Hello Sandra. I read what you posted and I cant tell U how sorry I am. The last sentences of your post is why I am responding. I too have panic attacks from time to time. Worst part for me is that EVER medication prescribed to me gave me such horrible side effects that I just cant take them. I guess whats even worse is that people like doctors, friends, and family say to just snap out of it, buck up, get over it/move on, etc. Until they've gone through what you've gone through, they'll never ever be able to fully understand what you go through. Wouldn't it be nice if it was THAT easy to just "snap out of it" and never have a panic or anxiety attack? I wish U all the best Sandra!
OK same thing is happening to ya'll that is happening to me I used to be a athlete, a traveler, now I can't even leave my town without getting an attack sometime I think it's is a spiritual thing a unknown entity that hold us away from the beauty of the world. I traced ever memory that I ever had and I couldn't come up with anything that would scare me so bad. OK ask your self what is so bad about dying the unknown, hell, well if it's hell your worried about then there is something in your past that has put you in this position on being scared of dying, burning is not a way of internal life. So what I'm getting at is you have to ask forgiveness and also forgive yourself. I truely believe that demons take over our lives and hold us there so we can just fail and hate God for making us this feel this way. And for some reason if this is not the reason for us feeling this way then what do we have in common. I have asked others this question and there are a couple of things Cigarettes,alcohol,drugs(maryjuana preferably common)and the most common of the them all is shots that we have taken as kids have you ever thought shot would do something to us mentally maybe it's not even our fault or our genes maybe it's the fault of others for not knowing the unknown we are just the few who had long term side effects. Not a reason to be scared but something to look in to. You can email me you thoughts bertsworld04@yahoo.com
Hi to all:
I am suffering from panic/anxiety attacks, PTSD, and depression. After years of denial, frustration, and confusion, I was driven to "get help" after I had my 2 kids. My doctor put me on Topomax and Risperdal. I am so miserable. It's been 2 weeks, and I want to die already. I really don't know what to do. I mean, is there something else? I feel worse than I did.
To make a long story, less long, I've been seeing psychiatrists and psychologists for over fifteen years. At different times and by different doctors I've been diagnosed with no less than four different disorders. I've tried every SSRI, mood stabilizer, benzodiazapine and some older class anti-depressants, It seems that I am almost treatment resistant.
After many trials and errors, I've narrowed down my symptoms to chronic anxiety and periodic panic which manifests as acute irritablity and leaves me completely unable to function and contemplating suicide. For the past two months, I've been on a combination of Neurontin, Buspar and Klonopin that allows me to love and be loved, help myself and prosper professionally. I take 800mg of Neurontin 3x a day, 100mg of Buspar 3x a day, and 1.25mg of Klonopin divided into 3 doses/daily.
What concerns me is this. I've been taking Klonopin as needed, for fifteen years. There have been periods as long as nine months when I haven't needed it. There are other times when I needed it more frequently. I have never, since I began taking it 15 years ago, taken more than 2mg. per day, never. I know the risks of Benzodiazapines: dependence, tolerance (brain damage) etc. I should mention here that my mother and my brother both have been taking, along with a SSRI, .5mg of Klonopin 3x a day for over ten years without ever having to change the dose. Which leads me to the following question? Is it possible to be treated long term with low doses of Klonopin and not develop tolerance?
I have been trying for years to avoid having to take Klonopin, as part of my mental health medication mix, with hopeless results. I exercise regularly, eat healthy, do not drink, smoke or take drugs that aren't prescribed. I study yoga, relaxation techniques and Buddhism. I participate in weekly, cognitive-behavioral psychology sessions. What is your advice? How can something that restores and sustains my sanity be considered toxic?
Please help.
My name is Melody and I am 20 years old about to be 21. I have severe anxiety and panic disorder. It is the worst thing to go through and experience in your life. I see a phychiatrist and psychologist on a regular basis.I guess the therapy works a little but not good enough. They had me on Klonopin and Celexa. And now I am on Xanax and Celexa. It is no good or fun. They say you get the disorder genetically which probably true my mother and grandmother both have it and now me. And I have heard from so many people that it is in my head and I can get over it or just dont think about it bt it doesnt work like that and for people who dont understand whats going on then they need to back off. Its not something you can just get over its alot more then that. Sometimes I cant even leave my house just to go to the store or to get a pack of Cigarettes.I also cannot go into a movie theater I have a really bad attack if I go near one. Which sometimes can cause problems in a relationship. But for whoever reads this or has this disorder I completely understand what it is like. It is something you have to deal with but the most horrible feeling you could ever experience. I used to smoke a lot of marijuana to help with the panic and it worked for awhile (like 3 years) but now I dont smoke and just take my meds and continue with therapy. So to all you out there with the disorder you are not alone and there are several other people out there with the same problem just want to post it or even talk about it.
I'm 50..a borderline personality & recovering cutter.Panic disorder is now my main issue.15 years in recovery,I believe drs still don't respect these issues.I'm still labeled because of the scars on my arms.I didn't choose this.It's an illness.I stay away from people who don't understand.I wish I could go off my meds..I've tried. Sanity is worth the risk.I'm still breathing in Atlanta.
I'm 18 and I started I started getting panic attacks when I was 16. I am afraid to go into any place other than my home. I also get anxious sometimes when interacting with people. I am making progress by having my mom take me on drives around my neighborhood, even if they're short I count that as major progress. I also like to take walks outside on my property, and I take along a camera and take pictures of landscapes and things since I live out in the country. This helps me get my mind off the fear, and focus on doing something I love to do. I also try to conquer my fear of talking to people by having some close friends I trust come over and just hang out with. My advice for others with this problem is to remember that yes, other people don't know what you're going through but YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I don't mean that just in the sense that others suffer with you too, but also your family and friends are great support systems for you. Even if it seems very lonely (trust me, I have felt that extreme lonliness I know some of you do) there is someone who cares! The best thing you can do is give yourself a break! Remember, you are going through this, and you will make it out on the other side. And know that because you are surviving through this, it gives you a strength that a lot of people don't have. Just take a little step at a time, and for every little step you make, reward yourself big time! Agoraphobia/Anxiety/Panic Attacks are all hard things to deal with, but others have made it through. The process is never easy, but in the end it gives you so much strength. It's really hard to see that when you're going through, but look back and see the good things you've gained and learned from your expirience. I still have a ways to go before I'm able to conquer the fear, but I see the way I've come and that gives me enough strength to press on. JUST KEEP TRYING, KEEP TAKING IT ONE LITTLE STEP AT A TIME.
Prayers for everyone who reads this. I hope God blesses you, gives you comfort when you need it, and gives you that strength you need.
hi, i've read many of the postings you all have left but not all, i'm 44 one kid in college one out, i have ptsd, anxiety disorder, panic attacks, depression..but worst of all agoraphobia. wow i feel better after having read your alls stories cause i feel crazy! have been with same psychiatrist for 13 yrs.. he's great but i feel we've tried everything...currently taking klonopin 1mg 3 times day..latley was taking 150 mg of effexor xr but mad me so sleepy, crazy, and dopey have cut back and will see my dr. monday hope something else works..i think i've been on everything invented..wish me luck! i try to leave my house at least once a day to go to little store around corner or get the mail at the bottom of my lane (live on a farm, have horse rescue and riding business) thank god i work from home as i cannot imagine getting part time job. i'm afraid i'd panic..can't even go to market. have supportive husband but i'm running him ragged w/ all errands etc..also afraid of mail, etc..even my trips down the lane are a major production. good luck to all of you, i know what it's like..thank god i found this website! i don't feel so terribly alone any more.
hi, can we make this more of a forum? i am totally computor illiterate, however i'm on a veteranary forum thats wonderful, you can talk..ask..answer questions etc. this blog has helped me feel less alone, but do you all agree that if we could comunicate we'd all feel alot better..w/ agoraphobia, like so many others i'm pretty much stuck at home..does anyone know how to set up a forum or chat room?
Hi Helen,
We have a great support group discussion on our message boards. Blogs are a bit different, in that the comments are intended for readers to leave an opinion, whereas our message boards are the forum you're looking for.
Welcome.
I have had social anxiety since i can remember. Panic attacks occur far and few between but when they occur it is NO FUN. the last tme I had one I was sure my heart was coming out of my chest. My anxiety oftened prevented me from going out in public w/ my wife and kids, or if I did go out I would ruin it for everyone w/my anxiety, and impatience to get home. I finally went to a doctor reluctantly do to a fear of the doctor not believing me and thinking I was just there to get meds. But he was great and i am now on paxil and klonopin which are helping me tremendously. Not only has it me a difference at home but has also made a huge difference at work. If there are people reading this that have these same anxiety problems don't be afraid to ask your doctor. Because that is what these medications are for, to improve your quality of life.
I had my first panic attack when I was 10 years old, and it has been an uphill battle since then. I was afraid to go anywhere and even began having attacks in my own home. I was having between 5-10 attacks each day. After about a year my parents put me in therapy. I went to therapy twice a week for two years at which point we thought I was "cured." Shortly after, I began cutting myself to help stop the attacks when they occurred. I can't explain it, but the cutting made me feel so much better. During an attack, you feel detached from reality and the cutting brings you back. I am now 21 years old and have been taking medication for anxiety and depression since I was 15. My life is so much better now. I still have the occasional attack, but they aren't as severe. I also don't cut myself anymore, but sometimes have the urge to. I guess I just want to let everyone know that there is hope! I went from being terrified of leaving my bedroom to moving out-of-state to attend college!
I wish I knew more about this subject, because I'm getting to know more about this guy I'm dating..who just got over this agoraphobia. We were friends for a while and I used to talk to him online when he was going through it. He could not get a job or do anything but sit at home and be depressed. I'm sooo glad he is able to live a "normal" life outside his house, he has a new job now and a nice car that he loves driving around; Yet I know he is still on some kind of medication, which I believe are anti-depressants. I just home he doesn't relapse one day and not be able to live his life. If he does though I wish I knew more about it so I could help him, or help prevent that from ever happening to him again. He's such a good person it's a shame to see him hurt, is there anything I could do to help? Since he still is on some kind of medication, is there anything I should look out for?
Wow, so nice to know I am not alone.I had my first Panic Attack will driving about 15 years ago.After 3 more attacks in two weeks and 2 more trips to the ER, plus a week in the hospital. They gave me the "news". The first thing my doctor told me is that Panic Disorder is a medical condition and needs to be treated medically. I also learned that a significant number of people with Panic Disorder have heart murmurs, such as Mitral Valve Prolapse of which I have a very slight case. He had me read a book called the "Anxiety Disease" by David Sheehan ( it's an old book) but I did learn a lot from it. I believe that to get better, it is critical to get professional counseling and not just take the meds only. Someone once told me about Panic Disorder "If you don't set limits for yourself, your body will set the limit for you". Ugh.
Here are two great articles written by a man who has gone through this for years and has found a way to battle it. These articles do help. http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/438384/in_support_of_those_with_panic_disorder.html
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/541385/immediate_relief_tips_for_sufferers.html
my panic attacks started when i was 23 years old after having my first baby girl. it wasn't really bad because i still do things that i love to do but i noticed the increasing thoughts like when im in the car driving my chest would ache, heart palpitation then thinking that im having a heart attack it continously happening everytime i get in the car. Then i had my second child 0f july '06 i was in and out of the hospital for the first few months have taken PAXIL, ZOLOFT but the side effects was so intense that i didnt want to be alone with my kids where escape might be difficult or help unavailable in the event of developing sudden panic-like symtoms. I am now 27 years old have suffered panic attacks and diagnose with agoraphia for 4years now and only taken ATIVAN doctors says its addictive but this is the only medication that can help me get better because i only take it when i feel like im going to have panic attacks...I have help myself through including GOD in my life go to CHURCH every sunday, seeing a THERAPISTS would really help, when WORKING interact with co-workers, HAVING FRIENDS to talk to when feeling down, WORK-OUT GO TO THE GYM do not avoid places that scares you I admit that i have this thing [illness] but it will not take over me [confidence]exercise your mind keep your head up SAY THIS TO YOURSELF I CAN BEAT this PANICK ATTACKS/AGORAPHOBIA[illness]...I trust god with my all he will never fosake me we all know that he's the one who can help us with everything you just have to TRUST...I hope that writing this will somehow help you like it did to me thanks for your time and im sorry that we all have to go through this [illness] and also god will not give us this problem if we cant handle it.
i am much like the rest of you...i have paxil which i am to take but i dont because i am afraid to...i am afraid of medicine in gerneral afraid i will be allergic to it and stop breathing...thats my biggest fear...i didnt start having panic attacks until after i had my little boy and it has progressivly gotten worse...i want to go out and plahyh with my son but i am afraid i wont be in reach of a phone in case i need to call 911 or something i feel most comfortable near a phone or in a hospital which is weird...i just really hate this..i wish i could take my medicine but i am too afraid and i dont know what to do
Hello to all of you! I am a man, 53years old and I am Portuguese and living in Lisboa/Lisbon - Portugal.
Talk about Agoraphobia - PTSD - Panic Disorder is the most difficult subject to "say words", or the easier one!!! Its like talking about the Universe - what came first? The Universe or the Big Bang??? Pick your choice! Thats what Doctors do about OUR disease!!! They know Nothing! We FEEL IT ALL!!!! I started having Panic Disorder when I was 19 years old. Doctors,medication,tests,more tests,more doctors and medication...We all know how it works. I am on Xanax 6mg/day and Dumyrox/Fluvoxamine 150mg/day for 15 years and I dont intend to change medication or even talk to a doctor! I also lost all my "friends".Family....? Where...????? I Love music,my PC, the NET, I LOVE myself!!! I DO!!!! Who else will love me???? Those who stoped talking to me even on the phone are just poor minded, their minds are so miserable compared to OUR AGORAPHOBICS brains!!!!! WE ARE THE BEST AND WE HAVE TO KEEP IN TOUCH AND TALK ABOUT EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING!!!!!
How many PAs I had? As many as stars in the sky...! Can you count...?
I LOVE YOU ALL AS MUCH AS I LOVE ME!!!!
My name is Jorge or George in English!
Hope to hear from you.
Love
Jo
Sandra,First off I want you to know you are not alone I am 25 years old and know exactly how you feel I have had anxiety off and on since I was 8 years old and have done a few in the psychiatric hospital myself gone to countless numbers off doctors and so on and so forth and if I may as a person whos been there add that I noticed that you said you have been on the same Medication for ten years and are still living with this nightmare? why not try something new? I've been on and got off countless medications because they didnt work for me and am now on a medication that fits me perfectly have been for 3 years, and only started getting anxiety one time in all those years for about 3 weeks due to stress of moving and losing my job at the same time! Anyways, Im not a DR just someone who understands. Youll be in my thoughts and prayers and I hope so much you find the solution its never to late to overcome anything remember that
I have what I thought were strange symptoms. I've been through every test imaginable. The doctor says its Anxity and Panic Disorder. She has put me on Xanax. I took it for a few days. The symptoms started to go away and in fact did, I quit taking the Xanax thinking that I could control this myself. Well less than two weeks later the symptoms are back. I'm going back on Xanax tonight. I feel such a feeling of doom and gloom, like I'm terminally ill. I feel guilt feelings for everything. When I think back, I've felt this at different intervals my entire life. I have memories of thoughts I had from as far back as age 3. I'm now 54. I have tinling, sensations, pain, then just run from one spot to another. Sometimes just rubbing my hand against something hurts. How can anxiety and panic do this to someone. What is it in our systems that cause this?.....Will I ever be normal without the meds again?
My attacks started when I was 13, I finally went to the doctor when I was 45 because my attacks came every 30 minutes by then and nearly drove me insane. My very patient and understanding doctor worked with me until we found a cocktail of drugs that worked for me. Wellbutrin, topomax and celexa. He save my live.
I AM 38, MAJOR PANIC AND ANXIETY HAS RULED MY LIFE. IN MY EARLY YEARS I WAS AN ATHLETE, WITH NO PROBLEMS. ONCE I TURNED 20 ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE AND I HAD MY 1ST PANIC/ANXIETY ATTACK. OF COURSE I WENT TO THE HOSPITAL AND THEY TOLD ME I NEEDED A PSYCH.WELL THAT TURNED OUT SHITTY, HE PUT ME ON ATIVAN,KLONOPIN,VALIUM,XANAX. LIFE WAS GREAT B/C I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS SOOOO STONED! NOW AFTER REHAB I CAN TAKE KLONOPIN AND ATIVAN AT SMALL AMOUNTS. I HAVE ANXIETY EVERYDAY OF MY PATHETIC LIFE. MORAL OF THE STORY- WATCH WHICH PSYCH U GO 2!
Im 25 and suffer from sever anxiety and panic disorder. I am in therapy and take meds. My family doesnt understand the extent it has gotten to. Im so scared, I dont wanna leave the house. what am I supposed to do?
I am 18 years old, I'll be 19 in October and I am prisoner of agoraphobia. When I was 13 I was going through alot of issues at home. One day at school, during lunch, I began to feel faint. I am used to having fainting spells when I get cut but I had never had one for any reason other than that. The next thing I knew I woke up in the floor and everyone was standing around me. I was so embarrassed, but baffled by the fact that it had never happened for no reason before. After that I developed a phobia of eating in the cafeteria and restaurants. I started having my lunch in the detention room. If I had to sit in the cafeteria I refused to eat and I would nervously try to keep myself distracted with a book or crossword puzzles. I also refused to eat school food since I associated that with my fainting. I never wore the outfit or shoes that I wore on that day. Any actions I had taken prior to fainting in the cafeteria, I would not repeat. Simply because I was afraid that one of those things had caused it. The anxiety loomed over other areas of my life too, but not as severely. It took a long time for me to get over it, but by senior year I finally accomplished that, without medication or therapy. I was so happy to be able to eat school food in the cafeteria for the first time in four years and go to restaurants and actually enjoy myself, rather than dash off to the bathroom everytime I felt anxious. I was "normal" again. I took drivers ed because I was ready to get my permit and learn to drive. I was planning on moving to a new city to go to college, get an apartment with friends after graduation, life was great. Then graduation day came. I was a nervous wreck all morning, but when we finally made it down to the gym lobby, all I could see was black, the sounds of the cheers from inside was buzzing in my ears, my whole body was tingling. I felt like I was going to pass out so I jumped out of line and ran behind a wall where the bathroom was. Luckily, my old gym teacher who was a trained first responder came over and talked me out of my very first "full-on" anxiety attack. It was horrible. I couldn't breathe, my face and hands were tingling, heart pounding, I was dizzy. The worst part was knowing that I had no choice but go in there and face my fear of going up in front of thousands of people because my family had been looking forward to this day, I was the first person in the family to graduate. In the midst of my attack, I looked across the lobby and saw my father and grandmother in there too. My grandma was going through the same thing. Anixety is extremely hereditary in my family. I had heard stories about how she went through a stage where she couldn't even leave the house and couldn't even visit me at the hospital when I was born or grocery shop. I never understood that and always said, Thank God it's not me! But at that moment, began my downward spiral into the hell of agoraphobia. After I got seated in the ceremony I tried to keep calm. But when it came time to go receive our diplomas it started again. Mrs. J came to my aid once more. The whole time I was waiting in line (it seemed like forever)I was crying and telling her I couldn't do it. By the time we got up there I was able to cross the stage alone. After that day I went to New York to stay with family for awhile. About a month later I was in a crowded bagel shop waiting in a line and I got really panicky. Which was weird because, besides graduation, I hadn't had those feelings for a long time. I went out to the car and waited for my cousin and my bf. It was embarrassing because he didn't know what was wrong with me. Later that summer I began to notice feelings of panic in the supermarket or big stores, such as wal mart. I shrugged it off though. What I didn't know was that my subconscious was developing a horrible phobia of standing in lines and being in front of or near a bunch of people, or public in general. In November, when I was back home I went to wal-mart with my family to prepare for a trip. I began to feel anxious when my mom sent me off with my little brothers into the grocery section and she went elsewhere. I kept thinking, what if I have an anxiety attack with my brothers. They'll get scared, and people will stare at me! I kept thinking, Oh my God! I'm gonna faint and they're going to freak out! I started yelling at them and being really mean, they didn't know why my mood had suddenly changed. I just wanted them to hurry so I could get out of that store. Once we got to the checkout I was fine. No one was in front of us so there was no wait. After that I became more and more anxious in public settings. I received temporary guardianship of my dad's two small sons. I was in the house 24/7. When my mom took me to the grocery store for Thanksgiving I panicked. I haven't been inside of a grocery store or wal-mart since November of last year. In January, we didn't have the babies for the weekend so my mom and I went out. I freaked out in applebees, we went in to order takeout. I went to the bathroom and sat in a stall crying, I kept thinking, I have no choice but to go back to sit with her! Eventually I regained my composure and went back, but after that I completely stopped wanting to go anywhere at all. I stopped even going for rides in the car. I bought valerian and L-theanine and passion flower from a supplements store online. It really helped me through a vacation we went on in late February. I noticed that if I take enough of those gross supplements and ease myself into public (like walking on the sidewalks and gradually entering various little shops, then a small museum) then I'm ready for a non-crowded restaurant. But since I can't swallow large pills and those supplement capsules are gigantic, I have to pour them out onto my tongue and it makes me gag everytime. So after I came home from the trip I was in my house for two more months without leaving. One day me and my younger brothers went to go stay at my aunt and uncle's house for a custody transition (they decided to take them so I could get on with my life, but I came to help my aunt out with them). I started getting out more, going for rides in the car more often. I actually when shopping at Khol's one day, I got so excited I splurged on a really cute dress! Since then I've come back home, I try to go for rides as much as possible. But I still don't go into indoor public places yet. I try to avoid taking my supplements unless 100% necessary. I still don't have my license, I'm too afraid to go to the DMV to get my permit. I need medicaid but my mom has to apply for it for me and she can't take off of work. But once I do get it, I'm going to freak out about going to the doctor. I suddenly have a major fear. My sister is 15 and just went for her first gyno exam to get on birth control and I haven't even had one yet! I'm too scared, especially after she described the whole thing to me earlier. I feel like such a loser and I'm too embarrassed to even keep in contact with my old friends. They've all started college, drive, work, go out and have a blast. But not me. I don't know what to do. I just wish someone could relate to me. People just make fun of me.
. I suffer from the same condition you do and also multiple personality disorder. My husband does not understand either. The problem is, we are international architectural photographers. We travel a lot. Sometimes I am ok, but we have been on the road for 4-months now. Jamaica, Bahamas, and now Mexico. Typically we are supposed to stay in the villas we shoot, but I have had episodes that have caused us to lose clients, so now we had to rent a condo. He doesn't understand why I can't leave to go to work, get food, etc. He feels like hes has to do everything, and he does. Now I am knee deep in a major episode. He has been buying cocaine, which I used to never do, for the past week. He says it helps me, but I am not sure. I think he might leave me. I have a home doctor that comes to the house and have tried every medication in the book. Do you have any advice? I would really appreciate it.
Thanks,
Rhea playasoulphotography.com
To MEL,
I m not one to be able to talk about a cure because I am in the same condition myself. You need to get on some meds, though I am sure. I am taking a few. I am in Mexico now and just got recommended a new non FDA approved med Atemperator LP. I will let you know how it works. Just hang in there and email me anytime.
We are all here for eachother and that is what this site is about. Stay strong
Rhea
playasoulphotography@yahoo.com
I am so glad I found this site. I am 34 years old and have suffered from anxiety/panic attacks/agoraphobia since I was 17. The first couple of years were absolute hell as I am sure you can all relate (hospitals, meds, doctors). But what I have found is that I had periods in my life with hardly any anxiety/panic attacks at all. I was recently laid off from my job , I am an architect and laid off due to the economy. I was fortunate to work out of my home. But when I got laid off, the terrifying hell of this disorder has imprisoned me into my home. After college I worked as a draftsman for my father for 13 years and then I worked out of my home, but for a year with my last employer I did work in an office everyday before they let me work out of my home, this is common because you need to be alone to concentrate. So all of my life I have been able to 'call the shots" so to speak. Even working in the office I could come and go as I pleased. Now the FEAR has kicked in bad, what will I do now? I remember times when there was no anxiety. When I could travel & drive alone for hours, now it takes me an hour to contemplate driving to the gas station for soda, etc. the big bad grocery store is too much. I try and leave the house everyday but it is torture at times. And the irony of it is that we all know it sounds crazy (thats why we believe we are), and that we fell so alone b/c the people closest to us don't understand, so we feel inferior and yet we need them to take us shopping! It is so hard not to beat yourself up, the worst thing you can do, but how can we not? But what I have noticed with me is when I let go of the self-bashing, guilt, and become somewhat peaceful I can do things, but it is a constant battle. Before i got laid off I had anxiety maybe once a week, now every day is a battle. I have been on Klonopin 1mg 3x a day for years. I have had excellent therapists and I know what tools to use and what I need to do - but when you are living in this fear day after day it is hard to utilize them. The sadest part for me is when my teenage son wants me to drive him somewhere and I just can't or I do and then I almost resent him for making me take him. Guilt again. I am trying to meditate more, dance alot (I competed in ballroom before I lost my job), eat better, and try to maintain some peace. I will never forget last year when I won 1st place at a ballroom competition and my instructor hugged me and said "see what someone with anxiety can do". I put that man through hell because their were time I couldn't drive to the studio or I just couldn't dance close together, so we would do yoga, etc. I always told people I was close to about my disorder that way I didn't feel like I was hiding "my secret". I love the anxiety & phobia workbook by Edmund Bourne, I have found it helpful from the start. I just have to keep trying and know that I can beat it, I have before, and stop dwelling on this setback. I am VERY afraid but I will try and try...I appreciate all of you and all of your stories, because when you have this disorder you feel so alone. Just knowing I am not alone makes me feel better. You are all in my prayers. God bless.
I am a 59 year old woman. I have agoraphobia, anxiety and depression. I have 2 children and 8 Grandchildren. I live in Phoenix, AZ and my Daughter and her family live in Austin, TX. Her husband works for IBM. I try and go visit them at least 2 times a year. I must tell you I actually get sick and withdrawn just at the thought of having to leave my apartment. I dread going and wish I didn't have to go. I don't want to leave my apartment and can't make myself go outside. I hate this feeling. I just want to die. People can't understand what I am feeling and they want to know why I don't come out. They say "Just come out and you can get over it". When I go out, I have to hurry and get back home to my safe place. I know this hurts my Daughter. She wants me to come and enjoy her family more often than I do. She had twin girls last Feb '08 and I couldn't even go to her. I hid in my apt. and cried. Finally I went in May and believe me I had to drag myself to the airport and hold myself down in the chair till the flight was ready to load passengers. I pray all the time during my flight and during my stay. I get to her home and all I do is sit there and enjoy the Grandkids. I tell her "All I am is a body to come home to". I can't go out and shop with her. I tell her to go ahead and I will stay home. I don't sleep for months before these trips and hope that I won't have to go for some reason. Then when I return, I tell myself I will not ever go again. And I really hope I don't have to. I was married 29 years and in Real Estate and owned my own business. I don't have any idea how I did it.
" Totally sick and tired of being sick and tired!!!!! " I must say that a million times a day. I am a single mom with 3 beautiful daughters and I also have Agoraphobia. The only time I leave my house is to go to the dr or grocery store and in order to go to the store my 10 yr who is my eldest has to be with me. It Makes me so angry that I am almost 29 and won't go to the store with out my daughter There has to be a way to get through this but I don't know how I saw your vent and finally felt omg theirs someone like me. I don't know maybe we could chat in a im casbear79@yahoo.com. Hope to hear from you.
4Mama1979
I am so sick and tired of being sick and tired as well. My life is a disaster. I am on several meds. My husband is leaving me. The only advice I can give is try not to take all these meds.perhaps they are bad for us??? I don't know.