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Parental Depression a Family Affair
When a parent gets depressed, it can cast a cloud over the whole family, and the whole family should be addressed in treating parental depression.
That's the bottom line from a new report, released today by the National Research Council and the Institute of Medicine.
The report is full of policy and research recommendations. But on a very practical level, the report makes it clear that parental depression affects children -- and that depression can be treated.
The sooner depression treatment starts, the better, notes William Beardslee, MD, of the psychiatry department at Children's Hospital in Boston.
"We really think getting treatment early is important," Beardslee says.
Beardslee says during one of the parental depression studies he worked on, a mother told him that when she was depressed, her after-school routine with her young son nosedived.
When that mother wasn't depressed, she would help her son with homework, play with him, and give him a snack. "She said, 'When I get depressed, all that just goes out the window and I plop him down in front of the TV set," the mother told Beardslee. "Our work with her was around how she could, despite depression, keep in place the structures that really helped this boy."
"The fundamental point," says Beardslee, "is that we need to view parents who are depressed as parents first and help them with that," besides treating their illness.
Another committee member, Mareasa Isaacs, PhD, executive director of the nonprofit National Alliance of Multi-Ethnic Behavioral Health Associations, says she's heard depression myths from parents that hinder them from seeking help.
"We know parents often feel they're going to lose their children," Isaacs says. "There are a lot of stigma-related messages that need to be changed for everyone to feel safe and comfortable in getting treatment."
Warning signs of parental depression are just like the warning signs of depression in people without kids. Symptoms of major depression include:
• Persistent sadness, pessimism
• Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, helplessness, or hopelessness
• Loss of interest or pleasure in usual activities, including sex
• Difficulty concentrating and complaints of poor memory
• Insomnia or oversleeping
• Weight gain or loss
• Fatigue, lack of energy
• Anxiety, agitation, irritability
• Thoughts of suicide or death
• Slow speech; slow movements
• Headache, stomachache, and digestive problems
Symptoms of dysthymia (milder, but long-term depression) are less intense and fewer in number, but long-lasting -- and of course, deserve treatment.
Have you or someone you know faced parental depression? If so, what was the toughest part -- figuring out that it was depression, finding help, or just getting through the day? Or is the depression going untreated?
That's the bottom line from a new report, released today by the National Research Council and the Institute of Medicine.
The report is full of policy and research recommendations. But on a very practical level, the report makes it clear that parental depression affects children -- and that depression can be treated.
The sooner depression treatment starts, the better, notes William Beardslee, MD, of the psychiatry department at Children's Hospital in Boston.
"We really think getting treatment early is important," Beardslee says.
Beardslee says during one of the parental depression studies he worked on, a mother told him that when she was depressed, her after-school routine with her young son nosedived.
When that mother wasn't depressed, she would help her son with homework, play with him, and give him a snack. "She said, 'When I get depressed, all that just goes out the window and I plop him down in front of the TV set," the mother told Beardslee. "Our work with her was around how she could, despite depression, keep in place the structures that really helped this boy."
"The fundamental point," says Beardslee, "is that we need to view parents who are depressed as parents first and help them with that," besides treating their illness.
Another committee member, Mareasa Isaacs, PhD, executive director of the nonprofit National Alliance of Multi-Ethnic Behavioral Health Associations, says she's heard depression myths from parents that hinder them from seeking help.
"We know parents often feel they're going to lose their children," Isaacs says. "There are a lot of stigma-related messages that need to be changed for everyone to feel safe and comfortable in getting treatment."
Warning signs of parental depression are just like the warning signs of depression in people without kids. Symptoms of major depression include:
• Persistent sadness, pessimism
• Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, helplessness, or hopelessness
• Loss of interest or pleasure in usual activities, including sex
• Difficulty concentrating and complaints of poor memory
• Insomnia or oversleeping
• Weight gain or loss
• Fatigue, lack of energy
• Anxiety, agitation, irritability
• Thoughts of suicide or death
• Slow speech; slow movements
• Headache, stomachache, and digestive problems
Symptoms of dysthymia (milder, but long-term depression) are less intense and fewer in number, but long-lasting -- and of course, deserve treatment.
Have you or someone you know faced parental depression? If so, what was the toughest part -- figuring out that it was depression, finding help, or just getting through the day? Or is the depression going untreated?
5 Comments:
I've faced parental depression, and all of it was hard: Admitting it (to myself). Finding help -- having to do the leg work and call for help at your lowest moments is next to impossible. And then you generally have to wait weeks before an appt. is available.
Even now, after treatment, I still have days where it's hard to be fully present as a parent.
That said, depression IS treatable, and things today are worlds better than they used to be. If anyone is on the line, wondering if they have depression or if they need treatment or not, check it out. You have nothing to lose but misery -- and you may become a better parent.
Jenny
www.bloggingboutboys.blogspot.com
I feel I am failing as a parent when I admit that I am depressed and diagnosed bi-polar recently and I do see my self slipping away to that world away. I don't want this to affect her. I am doing the normal things for treatment-meds and counseling but I still feel empty sometimes. Like all I am doing is going through the motions. I love being a Mother and she has saved my life from a living hell. She gives me a purpose and something to love unconditionally forever.
I have 2 teenagers and feel the separation of them not needing me much anymore. Life feels empty and lonely because for years us as mothers catered to them and were by their side for everything. The anxiety and worrying of them flying from the nest is much more now that they are older.I feel I need to fill the void and overcome this.Find hobby's and keep the mind busy.
I grew up with a depressed mother, but no one acknowledged it or dealt with it. It affects everyone and I wonder how things could have been different.
My mother has bipolar disorder and has for most of my life. I am 22. It is so important for bipolar parents to know that, while you should try to be the best parent you can be, you should have other adults in your children's lives so that when things get tough there are still strong role models and caregivers around. Treatment is absolutely important so that a parent may feel better, but don't think that your children won't notice mommy's mood swings and sadness. My mother raised 3 kids alone and we were often an afterthought. Bipolar disorder extends beyond the patient and affects all people who know and love the patient. Don't be too prideful to admit you need help.
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