How Much Should You "Push" Your Kids in Sports?
I've enjoyed the discussions we have gotten going lately on this blog, so I want to throw out another topic for an exchange of opinions. How much should kids, let's say young kids -- at the elementary level or even below -- be pushed to excel in a sport?
I'm going to share two stories and ask for your reactions. Bear in mind that these are not my children I'm talking about, just personal observations.
What I am trying to understand more fully is whether the kids truly like or want this level of commitment to sports. I know young kids who are very driven and dedicated to a particular sport at an early age, but is this based upon their own interest or upon what they've been told to do, either directly or indirectly? Whose needs are being met? How much "pushing" to excel in sports is appropriate? Does it depend on the individual child?
Here are some facts to think about. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, more than 10,000 people receive treatment in the nation's emergency departments daily for injuries that occur while playing sports and or participating in recreational activities. An estimated 1.5 million ER visits occur yearly for injuries sustained while playing basketball, baseball, softball, football, or soccer. Children under 15 account for about 40% of all sports injury-related emergency department visits. Many experts feel that children are at increased risk for sports injuries due to immature or undeveloped coordination, skills, and/or perception.
I understand the argument that society forces children to take on more and more at earlier ages. I've also been told by other parents (my kids are not yet at this age) that those who want to play on high school teams need playing experience on middle school teams in order to even make the high school team. Extending the analysis, one could assume that a child isn't going to make the middle school team without a good grounding in the sport during the elementary grades, and so on...
I'd love to hear your opinions on this one.
Related Topics: Will You Still Love Me If I Don't Win?, Kids Fitness Finder: The Right Sports for Your Child
I'm going to share two stories and ask for your reactions. Bear in mind that these are not my children I'm talking about, just personal observations.
- The setting is a practice swim meet at a swim club for elementary and middle-school children. One enthusiastic dad constantly shouted encouragements to his son, who was swimming in the 7-8 year-olds division. When the boy, an excellent swimmer, took second place to another child in one event, the dad met him on the pool deck and began to coach him on what went wrong and how to "do better next time." During a subsequent race in which the boy took part, I thought it got ugly. Dad began yelling loudly that one of the other swimmers (another boy of seven) should be disqualified because of improper technique.
- Another time I was attending a soccer game, and the team was made up of six-and-unders. When the final whistle blew, everybody celebrated, since there had been no real effort to keep score, and everyone had been enjoying the game. One team member had to leave the celebration early, though, for a quick change in the car into a baseball uniform. This child was scheduled to play a baseball game in less than half an hour.
What I am trying to understand more fully is whether the kids truly like or want this level of commitment to sports. I know young kids who are very driven and dedicated to a particular sport at an early age, but is this based upon their own interest or upon what they've been told to do, either directly or indirectly? Whose needs are being met? How much "pushing" to excel in sports is appropriate? Does it depend on the individual child?
Here are some facts to think about. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, more than 10,000 people receive treatment in the nation's emergency departments daily for injuries that occur while playing sports and or participating in recreational activities. An estimated 1.5 million ER visits occur yearly for injuries sustained while playing basketball, baseball, softball, football, or soccer. Children under 15 account for about 40% of all sports injury-related emergency department visits. Many experts feel that children are at increased risk for sports injuries due to immature or undeveloped coordination, skills, and/or perception.
I understand the argument that society forces children to take on more and more at earlier ages. I've also been told by other parents (my kids are not yet at this age) that those who want to play on high school teams need playing experience on middle school teams in order to even make the high school team. Extending the analysis, one could assume that a child isn't going to make the middle school team without a good grounding in the sport during the elementary grades, and so on...
I'd love to hear your opinions on this one.
Related Topics: Will You Still Love Me If I Don't Win?, Kids Fitness Finder: The Right Sports for Your Child
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4 Comments:
This topic can be highly debated just like religion and politics. Being a father of 10 and 8 yr. old boys and a 4 yr. old daughter I am comitted to coaching and participating in youth sports. At times two sports coincide and we find ourselves rushing and changing into a different set of uniforms on the car drive across town. What I emphazise to my children is to enjoy themselves, now we as parents have a different interpretation of "fun" versus what kids think is "fun". MY kids think winning is fun, losing is not so I differ with communities,individuals,parents,
coaches who say its not about winning, its about having fun! My 4 yr old daughter plays in a soccer league, not because I pushed her to sign up but because from a very young age she saw her older brothers competing, yes competing to enjoy themselves. Even when we tell the young kids to have fun, guess what? They know the score! and who won, who lost. Sports are a great way for kids to stay healthy and learn to trust, be good sportsman and respect others. There are those parents who live through their children, which then creates a bad experience for everyone involved. Sports is a lifestyle for our family. Dad, mom and kids all play sports year round whether its little league or adult rec leagues. If they want to play then their academics need to meet certain standards. Academics comes first before all, then they can have "fun"-let the kids have it their way, not the parents....
I am now a grandparent and have some length in experience in watching my children and now theirs,"have fun" in sports.I do believe it has now become a pre set course to select professional players at the age of 4 and on up to adult and I believe this is being abused by the educational system to get funds.I do not think any parent knowingly aware of results that put their child at risk is doing so but is convinced that the level of safety and concern for the child is put first.If all school sports were kept as all participate and play. and up to the age of 17-18 were not pushed beyond their growth,physical and mental most lost players due to damaged knees and backs would drop to less than 1% since the damage that ends up costing them total loss began when they were 4 or 5 and pushed to over compete.I will get a lot of fire for that and all I will respond is this look at the next jr or even high school football game and see if it is real fun or manufactured.Who is not getting to have the exercise or use of the equipment or coaching?Look in the hallways and see if the numbers passing by are being able to share in true health improvement of the gym or is it a test ground to get to the ones that survive for pro levels,tempting everyone with the hughe dollars?I love to see sports when the players enjoy to play and win but aren't willing to kill to win and want to share the better parts of the sport.It leaves room for the upper level competition to develope without damaging kids before they get a chance to develope their bodies and minds.I will always believe we as a whole have let competitive sports drive us and professional sports harm and deprive the majority of youth the best atheltic training and health that the world would ever have.Are kids pushed too hard YES, is it all parents NO, Should athletics be re-aligned to all participation sports and remove the hype from Jr and high school as well as below DEFINITELY YES!If the numbers of kids now that get to be at the level of athletees that we see in NCAA level sports,what would the numbers be if more stress was placed on all participating in the gym,on the track,in the pool,on the weight equipment and equally coached and not weeded out to play or not just so trophies could be won,Our children need a better athletic system not a more competitive one hurting the good ones and ignoring rest,after 18 yrs old take the top and the rest will be even better and none will lose.I will always believe and know in my heart the greatest ball team in the world played in a back yard and I have seldom met a kid that didn't want to go to gym until they found out that the good stuff was for THE team not them.
Sports for children has become a business and is no longer an extra curricula activity that it once once. Kids are being pushed by parents and coaches to "Get better" and the hidden meaning is to take steriods. This is happening at a high school level and is getting very dangerous for all involved. Parents want their kids to excel and be superstars at any cost. Kids who just want to play a sport for the joy of playing can forget it. Sad times for sports. It is a cheaters game.
AS THE PARENT OF TWO BOYS AGES 6 AND 7, I DEFINITELY THINK KIDS ARE OVERWORKED WHEN IT COMES TO EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES. WHILE I HAVE ONE KID WHO LOVES SPORTS AND MY OLDER SON HATES THEM. MY SISTER IN LAW AND COUSIN DIRECTLY TALKED MY INTO SIGNING MY OLDER SONUP FOR SOCCER BECAUSE IT WOULD BE GOOD FOR HIM TO LEARN A TEAM CONCEPT. MY SON DID NOT LEARN ANYTHING AS FAR AS I CAN TELL, HE SPENT HIS TIME ON THE COURT DANCING, SWINGING HIS ARMS, LOOKING AT THE CEILING, ROLLING ON THE GROUND, HE NEVER KNEW THE SCORE, HE NEVER KNEW WHERE TO KICK THE BALL IF IT DID COME NEAR HIM, AND HE DID NOT CARE TO BE QUITE HONEST. HE ALWAYS OPTED TO BE THE ONE WHO SAT OUT IF HE COULD. I FINALLY GOT THEM TO AGREE THAT IT IS NOT WORTH IT TO SEND THE BOY TO THESE SPORT EVENTS UNLESS HE CHOOSES THEM AFTER WE HAD THE SAME PROBLEM WITH HOCKEY. MY YOUNGEST SON HOWEVER CANNOT PLAY ENOUGH AND I AM WILLING TO ENCOURAGE WHATEVER HE WANTS TO DO. THIS IS NOT MY LIFE IT IS HIS, SO WHATEVER SPORTS HE WANTS TO TRY, HE CAN TRY. HOWEVER THE EXTRA- CURRICULAR THINGS I WILL ENFORCE UPON HIM SUCH AS THE BOY SCOUTS AND HIS RELIGIOUS EDUCATION WILL ALWAYS COME FIRST AS I BELIEVE AT THIS AGE HIS CHARACTER AND HIS MORALITY WILL NEED NURTURING, THERE IS ALWAYS TIME TO PLAY SPORTS LATER.
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