Imus: What Line?
The "I-man," Don Imus is under attack this week for calling the Rutgers women's basketball team "nappy-headed ho's." Listening to those around me comment on his situation, I am hearing either outrage that he would stoop so low, or outrage that anyone would make 'such a big deal' out of his comments. After all, Imus and fellow "shock-jock" Howard Stern have battled for years about which of them is the most shocking radio personality. It is what makes their shows stand out in the crowd, and it draws a certain percentage of the morning radio market share to their airwaves.
The I-man's comments have me wondering, what does his popularity say about us as a community of the world?
I often listen to Imus in the morning if I am in my car commuting somewhere. He is carried by my local talk-radio station and I prefer this format to current musical hits or pablum morning TV, such as the FM NBC radio affiliate carries.
Imus has intelligent guests and they often have interesting, enlightening conversations. I also happen to share some of his views on politics, and support his wife's opinion that we should decrease our footprint on the earth by personally using green products and eating more vegetarian meals (Deirdre Coleman-Imus is actually a vegan).
But there is no question that Imus frequently makes me cringe, and I will change the station, put in a CD, or shut him off and make needed phone calls (with my hands-free of course :>) to avoid listening to him abuse anyone, or spout off on his latest tirade on a subject that doesn't interest me. His latest offense doesn't really surprise me, but I do wonder why the media and religious leaders of the African-American community have decided to make Imus an example of all that is bad in the entertainment community, especially the Reverend Al Sharpton, who has made his own mistakes in commentary.
There have been any number of media personalities who have made off-handed remarks in the name of being funny who have gotten away with an apology, so why can't the I-man? The answer may lie, in part, with the huge influence that Imus has in the media world, and the fact that he has consistently held himself up as an example of all that can be right in a person of fame and fortune: he has dedicated his life's professional and financial success to raising awareness of the needs of kids with cancer and to research into sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).
I am more concerned about what this situation says about American society. Every day we tolerate all kinds of bad behavior, not only from famous people, but from the kids, the parents, the store employees, the patients, the health care workers, the world around us. We seem to have developed a standard of behavior that sets as its goal 'be as loud and obnoxious as people will tolerate, because you will become known and your needs will be addressed.'
It will always be true: everyone would like their fifteen minutes of fame. Some individuals are satisfied with knowing personally that they have done the right thing, but most of the world wants the stardom. This leads to much of the obnoxious public behavior that we observe and the popularity of live radio and reality TV.
In other cases, people aren't seeking global fame, but they want to be known within their community of influence that they are a force. They will behave in a way that gets someone's attention, and they believe that this will lead their perceived "needs" being met. These needs include demonstrating to the crowd of family or friends in their presence that they are important; they can draw attention to themselves and get taken care of, whether this means be waited on in a store, bank, or restaurant, or getting seen in the emergency department (ED).
In the ED I have to tolerate people being verbally abusive to me if they don't get what they want (never mind that in my medical judgment it's not what they need). I have to put up with kids under my feet, running around uncontrolled because even though they scream and yell at them, their parents can't manage to set limits and maintain control.
I have to work under the watchful eye of the intimidating lurker, typically an individual who looks like they'd smack me around if they thought they could get away with it. These individuals stand in the doorway of the exam room, hoping that if they look mean enough I'll see their family member before the chest pain that just arrived or the elder in septic shock.
I have to care for the sick and the wounded because they are worn down by abusive spouses or injured by their own addictive behaviors, and they carry that baggage into the ED with them, increasingly leading to violence and injury in acute care settings across the country. A lot of the world is in pain from their unmet needs, and they are lashing out.
When are we, as a society, going to draw the line? Where will we place it? When are we going to say to one another, "That behavior isn't acceptable?" When are we going to back that up the rules by teaching people a better way to cope than to be abusive to those around them?
Before the end of this month I will become 48 years old, middle-aged. I am not naive, nor am I an elder in this world tribe who might be thought to be out of touch by young people. I am a parent, and the most difficult thing that I do in that role is say no and mean it. It's hard. I have to practice all the time. But someone has to tell my child that this society, and the world, has rules. That breaking the rules has consequences. Someone has to help my child understand that that accepting stereotypes diminishes one's intelligence, that we don't say mean things to one another just to get someone's attention, that writing blogs that are hurtful or threatening is inappropriate, and that we all make mistakes that have consequences.
My child and Don Imus should know that life should never be lived at the expense of another's pain, joking or not. Mr. Imus and I, and all of society must set an example for our children. As far as I'm concerned, Don Imus's biggest crime is the example he sets every time he makes a comment that is not thought through. He well knows that life is about more than the fame and drawing attention to oneself.
Be peace, Laurie
Related Topics:
Technorati Tags: don imus, rutgers
The I-man's comments have me wondering, what does his popularity say about us as a community of the world?
I often listen to Imus in the morning if I am in my car commuting somewhere. He is carried by my local talk-radio station and I prefer this format to current musical hits or pablum morning TV, such as the FM NBC radio affiliate carries.
Imus has intelligent guests and they often have interesting, enlightening conversations. I also happen to share some of his views on politics, and support his wife's opinion that we should decrease our footprint on the earth by personally using green products and eating more vegetarian meals (Deirdre Coleman-Imus is actually a vegan).
But there is no question that Imus frequently makes me cringe, and I will change the station, put in a CD, or shut him off and make needed phone calls (with my hands-free of course :>) to avoid listening to him abuse anyone, or spout off on his latest tirade on a subject that doesn't interest me. His latest offense doesn't really surprise me, but I do wonder why the media and religious leaders of the African-American community have decided to make Imus an example of all that is bad in the entertainment community, especially the Reverend Al Sharpton, who has made his own mistakes in commentary.
There have been any number of media personalities who have made off-handed remarks in the name of being funny who have gotten away with an apology, so why can't the I-man? The answer may lie, in part, with the huge influence that Imus has in the media world, and the fact that he has consistently held himself up as an example of all that can be right in a person of fame and fortune: he has dedicated his life's professional and financial success to raising awareness of the needs of kids with cancer and to research into sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).
I am more concerned about what this situation says about American society. Every day we tolerate all kinds of bad behavior, not only from famous people, but from the kids, the parents, the store employees, the patients, the health care workers, the world around us. We seem to have developed a standard of behavior that sets as its goal 'be as loud and obnoxious as people will tolerate, because you will become known and your needs will be addressed.'
It will always be true: everyone would like their fifteen minutes of fame. Some individuals are satisfied with knowing personally that they have done the right thing, but most of the world wants the stardom. This leads to much of the obnoxious public behavior that we observe and the popularity of live radio and reality TV.
In other cases, people aren't seeking global fame, but they want to be known within their community of influence that they are a force. They will behave in a way that gets someone's attention, and they believe that this will lead their perceived "needs" being met. These needs include demonstrating to the crowd of family or friends in their presence that they are important; they can draw attention to themselves and get taken care of, whether this means be waited on in a store, bank, or restaurant, or getting seen in the emergency department (ED).
In the ED I have to tolerate people being verbally abusive to me if they don't get what they want (never mind that in my medical judgment it's not what they need). I have to put up with kids under my feet, running around uncontrolled because even though they scream and yell at them, their parents can't manage to set limits and maintain control.
I have to work under the watchful eye of the intimidating lurker, typically an individual who looks like they'd smack me around if they thought they could get away with it. These individuals stand in the doorway of the exam room, hoping that if they look mean enough I'll see their family member before the chest pain that just arrived or the elder in septic shock.
I have to care for the sick and the wounded because they are worn down by abusive spouses or injured by their own addictive behaviors, and they carry that baggage into the ED with them, increasingly leading to violence and injury in acute care settings across the country. A lot of the world is in pain from their unmet needs, and they are lashing out.
When are we, as a society, going to draw the line? Where will we place it? When are we going to say to one another, "That behavior isn't acceptable?" When are we going to back that up the rules by teaching people a better way to cope than to be abusive to those around them?
Before the end of this month I will become 48 years old, middle-aged. I am not naive, nor am I an elder in this world tribe who might be thought to be out of touch by young people. I am a parent, and the most difficult thing that I do in that role is say no and mean it. It's hard. I have to practice all the time. But someone has to tell my child that this society, and the world, has rules. That breaking the rules has consequences. Someone has to help my child understand that that accepting stereotypes diminishes one's intelligence, that we don't say mean things to one another just to get someone's attention, that writing blogs that are hurtful or threatening is inappropriate, and that we all make mistakes that have consequences.
My child and Don Imus should know that life should never be lived at the expense of another's pain, joking or not. Mr. Imus and I, and all of society must set an example for our children. As far as I'm concerned, Don Imus's biggest crime is the example he sets every time he makes a comment that is not thought through. He well knows that life is about more than the fame and drawing attention to oneself.
Be peace, Laurie
Related Topics:
Technorati Tags: don imus, rutgers
2 Comments:
I have to agree with you Ms. Laurie. People have become so mean to each other, they lie first before telling the truth, they are deceptive in their actions, and seem to want to make everyone around them as miserable as they are themselves.
In a way I blame politics for much of this. The American people have listened to blistering commentary from not only Imus, but also from Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, and Bill O'Reilly is so full of hate speak I fear for the ones listening to him.
I have heard more filth and lies and yelling from Rush, Sean, and Bill than I ever heard from Imus. Imus at least tried to help people. I don't think the other three do anything, but think of hateful things to say about others.
As an Independent, I find all of these men offensive. AND...don't get me started on Ann Coulter. She is evil. This is not totally political. This is about common decency that we were all taught by our parents. Our country has become separated in a way I don't think we will ever recover from UNTIL we remove ALL of these people from the airwaves.
We cannot tolerate the hate speech they spew anymore. Something must be done, and done soon. People are beginning to act just like Rush, Sean, and Bill, and this is NOT acceptable....not for us nor for our kids.
Teenage kids are so mean to each other that it is becoming a serious problem in and OUT OF school. Where do you think they learned this behavior?
I love my country, but I don't love the country we are becoming.
Monday, 33 students at Virginia Tech died at the hands of a lone gunman with a machine gun. (My age is showing.) Why does anyone need a machine gun...an Uzi? Why are they even legal to own. NO ONE HUNTS with an Uzi. I know this to be true because I live in Texas where nearly everyone has a gun collection.
What happened at Virginia Tech was terrible, but that many soldiers died in Iraq the same day. Where is that press coverage? What happened to our caring for another person?
A minimum of 100 Iraqi's died that day. Iraqi's with families that loved them. The estimate of Iraqi deaths in the last four years is 600,000. How many should die before enough is enough?
Iraq did nothing to us before their sovereign nation was invaded. The hijackers of 9/11 were Saudi Arabians. That country is not a FREE Democratic country either.
Invading Afghanistan and capturing Bin Laden was a good idea, and this is where all of our soldiers should be!
I also believe the Impeachment of Bill Clinton began a true hatred in this country of Republicans for Democrats. It worsened when they were not able to remove President Clinton from office. Their hatred is deep. This hatred is carried down by their followers who talk to their children about politics. It's a trickle down theory.
It makes me sad that our country has more deaths from guns than all the other countries in the world. Canada has more guns per capita than the United States, and they may have one death per year from gun violence.
How do we change our country back to where we all cared about each other despite political affiliations?
Good question. Thanks for you comments; it's nice to know someone is out there, listening. Laurie
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