Painful Family Decisions

As a nurse for many years working in long-term care, I gained a real appreciation for folks living in extended care facilities. It is not easy to have strangers caring for you -- helping you bathe, dress, prepare for meals, activities and sleep. There is no real privacy in these facilities. And, although the goal of long-term care facilities is to help people feel "at home", this is not home.

When a person lives in a facility, he must accept the schedules of that facility. Mealtimes are dictated. Foods are prepared in bulk. Bath time is scheduled during pre-determined hours. Activities are planned ahead and trips outside the facility are monitored and often include signing out and back in. Even lengths of stay away from a facility can be influenced by reimbursement guidelines. How sad and painful to lose such independence and control over your life.

Watching parents and loved ones losing their independence is not easy on family members either. Roles switch. Children begin caring for parents. Decisions to place parents in long-term care are hard decisions to make. Concern and guilt often accompany these decisions. But sometimes there is just no choice but to choose placement. Have you found yourself in this situation? My heart goes out to you.

Related Topics: Choosing Long-Term Care, Caregiving Support Group

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