The Meaning of Commitment and Kindness

Photo Credit: Gary Minnaert

Recently my husband and I had the great opportunity to have breakfast with some fellow cruisers. We shared it was our honeymoon and everyone got excited and chatty around the table.

One couple shared they have been married for 65 years. How wonderful! I asked what their secret was. The husband said "kindness" is what keeps them together. He said that some days you have to give 115 percent and you may not get anything back that day. But the next day is a new day to start another 115 percent. Being kind in every way i.e., respect, cooperation, consideration, etc., is what makes a relationship work. He also stated that many folks today do not understand the real meaning of commitment and are too quick to bail out of a relationship. Relationships take a lot of work.

Another couple at the table had experienced life-altering challenges and they also demonstrated much love and commitment. With challenged speech the gentleman told us that the important things that have kept he and his wife together include talking to God. When they argue or fight, they then go to their separate space and talk to God. They stay separate until they have had a chance to calm down and think about things. Then they reunite and discuss things. He said it is important to keep communication open and resolve issues promptly. Don't let them fester and build because they sometimes become very difficult to resolve. His wife agreed.

I felt it was a blessing for my husband and I to share breakfast with these lovely couples. They both wished us much love, commitment and longevity in our marriage. I walked away from our meal with a sense of excitement and hope for my own new marriage.

Many folks with chronic pain and disease are not fortunate to have the love and support of loved ones. Many families are tested to the limit and do not pass the test of durability to sustain their relationship through the storms of life and they crumble.

It may be beneficial for counseling in the early stages of disease or life altering change to be a more standard component of treatment. It is evident that pain, disease and disability effect every part of person's life to some extent. And this includes the life of all people who are close to that person. Counseling may help families to develop methods and ways to overcome the challenges and keep the vital component of communication open.

Related Topics:

• Love in the Real World
• Love & Survival

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