The Pain of Losing Children - Regardless of Age

Photo Credit: Zenera

I can not begin to realize what it must feel like to lose a child of any age. I pray mine lives forever so I don't ever feel the pain of such a loss.

I recently read of a horrific fatal car crash where 3 young kids in their teens and early 20s were killed. One sole survivor remains in serious condition according to the newspaper I read online. These kids were all from the surrounding area where I grew up and lived over 30 years of my life. I knew and worked with a relative of one of the victims. My heart goes out to her and her family. Reading the articles and seeing the photos of the mangled mess of what once was a vehicle, my heart aches for the loved ones that are left behind. And I pray for the lone survivor who is fighting for her life right now. I don't know her personally but that is okay. The Lord does and He hears my prayers.

It will take some time for many of the folks in these small towns to get over the tragedy of this accident. It will not be easy to get over the pain of such loss. I have always felt that emotional pain can be harder than physical pain. Physical pain can be horrible but it often goes away over time as physical healing occurs. Emotional pain on the other hand can last a lifetime and it can invade a person's life as fast as a momentary thought or painful memory is realized.

It is my earnest hope and prayer that the folks effected by this tragic loss will come together and support each other during this most extremely difficult time. Put away any petty grievances or strife they may have and use their energy to cope with the grief they all share. I pray they help each other and support each other as they work through the pain of their loss.

I pray they will find and lean on faith as they travel along their personal life journey. And I hope they will one day reach a point of comfort and emotional healing.

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• Coping With Grief
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Open MRIs: A Comfortable Alternative

Recently I needed another MRI of the low back because of a lot of burning pain in the lower thoracic and lumbar areas of my back. I remembered the last experience I had getting an MRI of the back and I felt very apprehensive about needing and getting another. I remembered the anxiety of feeling so tight and unable to move. There was only a very few inches between my face and the top of the tube I was in. And I couldn't see the other end of the machine at all from the position I was in.

I also remembered fearing I would not be able to get out of the machine once I was pushed all the way into it - although I was told by the technicians that they never lost anyone in their machine before. Everyone that went in definitely came back out!!

Well since that last MRI, I had actually lost a little weight and I was trying to remain hopeful that I would feel easier about this one. However I noticed that padding was added to the sides of the MRI since the last one I had and the technician also placed pads between the side of my body and my arms. He said it was to keep me from feeling too warm. Well with all of this extra bulk around me, I was unable to move into the MRI machine at all, so the test was canceled that day. Luckily I was able to find an MRI site with an open MRI and obtain an appointment for the next afternoon.

The next day I arrived at my appointment a few minutes early. I tried to keep my anxiety down. I am not sure what I expected. I still had to enter a "tube," however this one was larger and less confining. The length of the machine was about 4 feet long so I could actually see out the other side of the machine if I tipped my head back a little. What a difference! I was able to manage the procedure much more comfortably. My anxiety dropped considerably. The machine was just as loud but I had ear plugs and there was also a radio playing that I could actually listen to during the whole time I was in the tube. I had to have an injection of contrast dye again, however I had no problems or reactions to it. I was very relieved.

From now on, if I have to have another MRI, I am going to opt for the open MRI. It is well worth it.

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• Should I Have an MRI?
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Technorati Tags: MRI, anxiety, back pain, health and wellness

Walking

Photo: Brook Riddick

Sometimes I feel so jealous as I watch people walking or skipping along their way. Every step I take is slow and deliberate and often painful somewhere in my body. I find myself wishing - if only I could bounce so freely as they do. Being able to walk along without a second thought is something that is often taken for granted.

People do not realize how lucky they are to be able to walk freely and without pain. They probably will not realize just how lucky they are unless they find themselves in a situation where they can no longer do so.

There are times when I need to walk with a cane. I remember the first time I tried to maneuver a fast food restaurant alone while walking with a cane. I found it difficult to carry a tray one-handed without spilling anything. This is something that many folks take for granted. I was overwhelmed by the situation and just left the restaurant without eating.

Since that day I have realized the importance of not taking what you have for granted. You never know if the time may come when you lose the ability to do what you do so naturally now.

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Technorati Tags: chronic pain, walking, health and wellness

The Power of Fear

Lately I have been going through some extremely painful times with my neck and low back. They have really effected my whole life. I remember talking with someone who was experiencing similar pain and they shared how their pain scared them. I think I know how she felt because the pain I am having is severe enough to interfere with my life at all levels and I find myself getting very concerned about it. I am scheduled for an MRI later this week and I hope the results are definitive so I know what I am dealing with, but not serious enough to interfere with my work or family life any more than it already has.

Fear is a powerful thing. It can cripple you if you let it. At one point I found myself feeling overwhelmed at times when the pain is at its worst and I realized I needed to stop and take a look at everything that is going on. The way a person feels emotionally effects the way they feel physically. I may need to make some changes in my life. I may need to cut back on the things I am doing and the projects I am involved in. I may need to simplify my life where I can.

I found that taking the time to write down my concerns on a pad of paper actually helped me. I guess seeing the list rather than just thinking about things over and over helped me to get a better handle on the reality of the situation. Writing things down also helped me to begin to move in the direction of regaining some control over the situation. Knowing what needs to be done is the first step in getting organized so it can be done. Even if the most important thing is for me to start feeling better, then I have to take the time and do what I need to do to accomplish this. And if this means cutting back in some areas of my life, then that is what I will need to do.

Perhaps you may find yourself in a similar situation. Maybe writing down the "necessary to do" and those "would be nice to do but really can wait" lists will help you get organized and feel a little more in control and less fearful or concerned about your circumstances. It's a step in a positive direction anyway and I hope this will lead to less pain and more comfort.

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Technorati Tags: chronic pain, fear, stress, health and wellness

The Power of Words

It is no secret there is a strong mind/body connection. What you think, say and believe can and often effects how we feel and how our body reacts to things. Recently I had the opportunity to reflect once again on this important connection while talking to a colleague about the concepts of neuro-linguistic programming - a concept I have heard of but never studied formally.

How often when you hurt do you say things like "My neck is killing me" or "My back burns horribly and I can barely walk." These are negative statements and when they are spoken the body can react to them. Since negative self-talk often has a negative impact on the body, it seems that positive self-talk could lead to positive results and in this situation, relief. This is surely something to ponder.

What if you were to substitute positive words and phrases in place of the negative ones? Instead of using the words "nerve pain" substitute the words "neurological challenges" in their place. What if we were to say "The discomfort in my back has limited my ability to walk" instead of saying "My back burns horribly and I can barely walk"? Do you think your body might respond a little differently? Is it possible that our body has been programmed to respond to the negative words or phrases we have spoken over time? If we had a chance to change that - if we could substitute more positive words and phrases in their place - wouldn't it be worth trying if it might lead to pain relief? Perhaps we have found a new tool for our pain management tool box.

What is your opinion? I look forward to hearing from you!

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• Mind-Body Wellness: Positive Thinking
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Technorati Tags: pain management, words, mind body connection, health and wellness