Everyday Fitness

I’ll bet that while you were on the hunt to find that special someone (boyfriend, girlfriend, eventual life partner), you probably went out of your way to take better care of your body and improve your appearance. Single folks of all ages can be seen hitting the gym to stay competitive as they battle it out with each other to fulfill their quest. Researchers even agree that this is indeed the trend.

However, there’s some sobering news about what happens after you’ve paired up, or get married. In a nutshell, most people let themselves go – resulting in weight issues and obesity.

Check this out. Married guys are three times as likely to become obese, and married women are twice as likely to become overweight. This data comes from a recent study of more than 17,000 couples between the ages of 20 and 70. The study noted that after tying the knot, the majority of married couples stated that they were now “comfortable” in their lives.

Let me define “comfortable” according to the study: the couples didn’t exercise very often, had less sex and their nutrition was of low quality. Study participants noted that once the stress and anxiety of finding a life partner was over, they didn’t feel the pressure to work as hard to look fit and attractive. This is “comfortable”? This sounds more like a marital coma.

The couples spend a lot of their time together eating and this is often in front of the TV while gulping down take-out meals resulting in widening girths and increasing abdominal obesity. There was a direct and linear relationship between poor lifestyle habits and matrimonial obesity.

There’s got to be a better way to partner up without blowing up. Here’s another sobering statistic. 8 in 10 men and about 7 in 10 women will be overweight or obese by 2020. That’s just 10 years away! C’mon, people. We can turn this around.

Here are some tips to set you on the right course to live healthfully and happily together:

1. Talk about how you want to live your lives together.
Honest, authentic and genuine communication is a critical element in building a strong foundation for any union. Right up front, talk about your health and wellness needs as a couple. The “I” part of the equation transforms into a “we,” as in “we need to stay healthy and fit together.”

And then make the connection between healthy lifestyle habits and living long and well to enjoy life and loved ones to the fullest. Commit to keeping an open dialogue about this throughout your years together. Embrace the fact that there will be countless challenges, but that you can adapt and adjust when life’s stresses threaten your healthy lifestyle.

2. Know your numbers.
Go see your doctor and know what your baseline health status is. Are you at risk for heart disease, diabetes or cancer due to your genetics and/or current lifestyle habits? Keep a home record of your medical exam, labs and body composition (body fat percentage, tape measurements of belly).

Get an assessment of your physical fitness through an experienced fitness professional. As a quick way to do this, you can look at the physical assessments in Fit to Live and see if you can pass each category. Use this as a basis for improving your numbers to keep yourself within healthy norms. You might also want to team up with a fitness professional and a registered dietitian if you need extra information and support.

3. Team up to live a healthy lifestyle.
Research shows that frequently, when one partner in a couple decides to change their lifestyle to get and stay fit, the other partner will follow suit. Studies also show that when a couple teams up on this, their success rate is far better than when one person refuses to participate in a healthy lifestyle.

4. Go it alone if you have to.
If you’re already living a healthy lifestyle, but your partner isn’t, you have to stick to your guns and take care of yourself. The hope is that your looking and feeling better will influence your partner to do the same. Clearly, it’s a bummer when you can’t share your healthy habits (e.g. taking that walk outdoors on a beautiful day) with your loved one. Just stay consistent and pray that your better half gets the memo one day and will join you.

5. Watch out for sabotage.
When one person is doing really well and the other is reticent to change, tensions and conflicts can arise. That together time – munching piles of junk and watching endless TV – may turn into an argument about watching less TV and doing other less food-oriented activities. When the less healthy partner keeps bringing tempting junk food into the house, there may be a war of words about how to handle the situation. Both parties have to calmly and supportively talk about this immediately and plan a resolution. Get help and counseling if it looks like this may become a major problem in your life.

6. Mind your gender.
Men and women may pack on pounds when they spend more time cooking in the kitchen as a couple. Women run into problems when they prepare a meal and end up eating the same portions as their guy. News flash, women: You’re not a 6’2″ guy with a hairy chest so don’t eat like one. Eat appropriate portions of food to rein in calories and keep your body fat down.

7. Plan your meals and activities together.
Help one another pack a healthy lunch to take to work. Grocery shop together when you can and enjoy each others company as you select healthy food. Make it a ritual and maybe stop for lunch or coffee while you’re at it. Schedule that bike ride together, or meet up at the gym. Buy home equipment and encourage one another to use it regularly. Keep both pairs of sneakers by the front door ready to lace up for a walk.

8. Have fun.
Find enjoyable activities you can do together. Take dance classes. What about ballroom dancing or Zumba? Next time you plan a vacation, make it one with physical adventure – biking through Vermont, taking a hike, or how about a spa vacation where you can concentrate on improving your mind and body while relaxing and rejuvenating?

9. Hang out with like-minded folks.
It really helps to surround yourself with people who live a similar lifestyle. Many couples choose to live in active communities with terrific hiking, walking and biking trails and health facilities. Or, simply create your own healthy lifestyle friendly living environment by doing your homework and finding out where other kindred spirits in your community are hanging out. Look at clubs and events. Make new healthy minded friends and do couples activities together. These kinds of changes help to reinforce your lifestyle choices as well as provide constant inspiration as you meet other folks who have successfully lived a healthy lifestyle.

Whether you’re new as a couple or you’ve been at it for a while, partnering up doesn’t mean you have to pack on pounds. Instead, see this as an opportunity to give each other the greatest gift of all – a healthy and happy you, for a lifetime.

Comment on this blog post and ask your questions on the Diet Exchange.