"The Best of Friends Party" A Family's Farewell to Their...Nanny!

One of the most important relationships your child may have is with his/her nanny. At Safety4Kids we are always on the lookout for positive stories that reinforce our messages of safety and wellness for young children, and of course, their parents. One of our blogging contributors, Jill Starishevsky, founder of HowsMyNanny.com, offers a heartwarming story about her friend's experience with her daughter's nanny. It reminds us all that in this often unsafe world, there are still wonderful people making a positive difference in a child's life.

And it's nice to offer some good news!

First Jill, then her friend Ellen's story.

Friday was a glorious day in the city. I found myself in Central Park at an event that was a first for me. It was a nanny going away party. My girlfriend's daughter has matriculated into the daycare/pre-K set and will be starting school on Monday. Thrilled with the incredible care her child received thus far from her wonderful nanny, she threw a little party for her nanny and dubbed it "The best of friends party". The chocolate cake bore that inscription and several of the nannies attended the get together with their charges. Each child seemed so comfortable with one another's caretaker. The children, who happened to be all girls, were all almost two years old and ran around the park giggling as the nannies chased after them. The party was similar to a bridal shower as the mom, flanked by her own parents, took Polaroid pictures of each set of nanny and child then pasted them into a little book and had each nanny write a message to their friend who was going away. There were small gifts and some tears, but overall the moment was quite charming.

As the founder of HowsMyNanny.com, I am often asked how to cultivate such loving relationships between parent and nanny and nanny and child. I often refrain from giving specific advice as I believe each case is different. But I thought everyone could learn something from this family. So I asked my girlfriend, Ellen, to tell me some of the things she did to cultivate the relationship and make it such a successful one.

Here's what Ellen had to say:

When I set out to interview nannies, I had an elaborate plan in mind. I prepared a detailed list of questions and knew to be aware of instinct. These are some of the questions I asked:

1. Tell me about your experience working with children.
2. What age groups have you worked with before? How do you feel about working with a newborn? A toddler?
3. Do you have any education or training in childcare? (also just regarding their education level)
4. Do you have children of your own?
5. Tell me about your previous jobs as a nanny? How long did you work with families? What were your responsibilities?
6. What kind of activities did you do with the children? What did you enjoy most or least about your positions?
7. If i spoke to your references, what would they say about you?
8. What are you looking for from a family? Employer?
9. Describe how you see spending a typical day with infant? A toddler?
10. How would you set limits?
11. How would you handle discipline? How would you reward positive behavior?
12. How would you handle a crying baby?
13. What do you see as your primary responsibility with my child?
14. What are you expectations?
15. Discuss flexibility of schedule, overtime, vacation, sick time, etc.
16. What other responsibilities do you have outside of your job? (i.e. family, church, etc.)
17. Discuss getting CPR/first-aid training.
18. Discuss criminal history.

I also had nannies actually hold Mollie, play with her and READ a story; this told me a lot about language, communication and warmth. (if a nanny arrived wearing perfume or excessive make-up, they never got to this stage of the interview)

The biggest thing that made my relationship with Harriette work was COMMUNICATION. We were very open with each other. Expectations were clear, and there were no secrets. To that end, I gave her a detailed care sheet that listed her duties and responsibilities.

We respected each other a great deal. She had a way of guiding me and offering suggestions without forgetting that I was the mother.

When I decided it was time to place Mollie in school, it was very important to me that Harriette find another family. I sent an email all my friends letting them know that a great nanny was about to become available. I wrote her a letter of recommendation and Harriette found another family within the week. We will miss her, we're so grateful for the care she gave our daughter each day.

We say, great job all around Ellen, Harriette, Mollie and of course our friend Jill. We would love to hear more stories like theirs. Please post a comment and let us know if you've had an experience with your child's nanny that's worthy of "The Best of Friends Party".

Safety Recall: Connecting the "Aqua Dots"

When did keeping our children safe become the most difficult task on earth? It used to be that we were concerned about them crossing the street, playing with matches, and fastening their seatbelts. At Safety4Kids, we're still obsessed with these safety concerns, and many others, and now we add to the list the growing number of downright dangerous toys, most of which are manufactured overseas. It's hard to know exactly what to do.

The latest recall is for "Aqua Dots", known in Australia as "Bindeez," also known as "Toy of the Year." Ever feel like you're living a Twilight Zone episode? The circumstances are extraordinary.

The Consumer Product Safety Commission, reeling from its own problems, has a long list of recalled toys to deal with as the holiday season approaches. We asked Dr. Carl Baum, to weigh in on this latest epidemic affecting children: Unsafe Toys! Here's what he has to say about "Aqua Dots".

"It seems to have become a weekly routine: another recall of lead-contaminated toys. But the recent announcement that a chemical in the Aqua Dots toy, when ingested, is metabolized to the date-rape drug GHB, was a real surprise. Who could have imagined that Australia's 2007 Toy of the Year could pose such a hazard? The good news is that affected children who are brought to medical attention in short order, and receive appropriate supportive care, seem to do well as the chemical is rapidly metabolized, consistent with our experience with GHB.

This latest twist on the old Mickey Finn knock-out concept, however unintentional in this case, reminds us that innovation may have associated--and sometimes hidden--risks. And parents should be mindful of the fact that the small beads in the Aqua Dots toy could represent a serious choking hazard to younger children in the household."

Buyer beware. And be safe!

(c) Safety4Kids

Technorati Tags: Aqua Dots, toy recall, safety, health, children

Naughty or Nice: Holiday Toy Safety

You don't have to look too far to find ads for the holiday season--it seems to begin earlier each year. And so does the pressure to find just the right toys for your kids. The latest, greatest trends, the impossible-to-find item, the sleep-on-line-all-night must have and everything in between. But the headlines these days are all about lead paint, recalls, and the dangers lurking around every corner. So what to do?

At Safety4Kids we've decided to try and help. We are not a toy safety lab and we do not conduct independent research about toys. We, in fact, are beginning to produce our own line of safe media products. But how, then, do you as a concerned parent, still make the holidays fun and fabulous for your kids?

This is the first in a series of posts about holiday toy safety. We're going to use our connections to get you some important information, and we're going to be your one-stop-shopping for that information. We'll put our links and materials in an easily down-loadable format and we'll update the information as we get it.
The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission is always a good place to start. And while it's always a little scary to read these documents, it's probably a good idea to at least glance at this site and find the information about the products that interest your kids. If electric toys are what the little ones are clamoring for, read the specific information related to that topic. It can really prove helpful in the long run.

Mattel has been in the news a lot lately, and you'd be wise to view the information they've voluntarily posted regarding their recalls. It can help you make informed decisions and also might help you do a little "cleaning out" of the toys already in your home.

Our partners at Parenting magazine offer a positive approach, recommending the "Toys of the Year" which are "mom-tested". This is always a great list, and we encourage you to take a look.

Which leads us to our own mom testing! And dad testing. And care-giver testing. In order to provide you with not only the official information, which is more statistical in nature, we'd also like to find out what you think! After all, parents are the best judges of what works and doesn't work for their kids. And oftentimes parents have an inside track on safety information, having experienced what works firsthand through trial and error.

So please post a comment and let us know about your own experience with toy safety. Maybe it's a toy your kids love that you feel is safe. Maybe it's a concern you have about a toy and we can help find out more about it for you. We'll be asking our clinicians to weigh-in as well.

So an early happy holidays from all of us at Safety4Kids and "SeeMore's Playhouse". Let's make this holiday season joyous and SAFE!

(c) Daniel Gale. Image from BigStockPhoto.com