Grey's When is Helping Enabling?
Not so much for myself --yet --but for my parents who are in their late 70s. As we age all of us lose abilities to do this and that. Losing the capability to do certain things like driving means losing some of our independence.
He had spinal stenosis, a condition caused by narrowing of the spinal canal. When severe, it can put pressure on the spinal cord and nerves coming off of the spinal cord. It's a common condition usually caused by degenerative spine disease from aging.
When it affects the nerves in the lower back it can lead to numbness, weakness, cramping, or pain in the legs. And as the docs in Grey's said, the elderly man shouldn't have been driving because he would not have good control over his legs.
So back to how do you steal a loved one's independence. I can't say that I have a great answer to that. What do you say? How do you tell them that it's time? How do you convince them the dangers are too great? If the situation comes my way I guess I'll figure it out then.
In the meantime this episode of Grey's made me realize I need to do whatever I can to get prepared for that time - for myself, for my parents, and for my family.
Related Links: Aging: It's Mind Over Matter, Caregiving Insights
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4 Comments:
about a year ago we lost a good friend in a head on collision with an elderly driver. Members of his family it turned out worked with her and they were as devastated by guilt as the victims family was with grief. Please...Please...Please take that drivers license away. The stress in your family caused by that issue can't be compared to what was experienced in this case
To take the keys away is something extremely difficult but also very important. How would you feel if your dad was driving a car that crashed into a school bus? You need to tell your loved one that they need to remember driving is not a right. In my home province there is mandatory testing for drivers over 80 every 2 years. They also have to get a physical exam. When we decided to take away my grandfather's keys we spoke with his doctor, who ended up doing the dirty work. Doctors of the elderly will know what to do when the time comes and if it frightens you just remember that driving is a privilege, not a right, and there comes a time when driving just is not possible anymore.
We live in a very rural area in the great plains. We are fortunate in having a grocery store in our little village. But the doctors and dentists are a 120 mile round trip. Our accountant and lawyer are 150 RT miles away. There is NO public transportation. Be careful in taking that driver's license away. There must be a support system and right now there is none!
I am 75 and driving since I was 20.I am suffering with oseoprosis and I am driving all right.
I hate to give away my car keys.I feel nervous when I am driven by others.Its the worst ordeal.
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