The Biggest Loser-Couples: Better to Have Loved and Lost?

Last night was not a good night for Paul. He seems to have suffered a setback not only in his weight loss, but in his emotional loss as well. Paul, you remember, teamed up for this show with his ex-wife, Kelly. Together they have experienced quite a roller-coaster journey on The Biggest Loser, but Kelly has been a key reason that Paul has consistently "put up good numbers" as they say in "weigh-in" jargon. Kelly, along with Jillian, helped motivate Paul and reminded him why he was there and why he had to get healthy, literally to save his life.

But last night's episode was very revealing: reality TV met reality, as the contestants were sent home for a week to see how they would fare in the real world. Away from their trainers, the gym, their partners and new friends, and the kitchen that is stocked with only healthy, approved food items. The results were dramatic.

Bob's blue team, who have spent the previous two weeks facing elimination, had been humiliated and demoralized by their consistent loss (not the good kind), both in the challenges and on the scale. So they left the campus with strong determination to continue their progress at home and to come back and post significant weight loss. They did not want to go to the elimination room again. It's also worth noting that while Bob provides support and oversight, he is not as connected to his team emotionally. These four macho guys are very independent and self-motivated.

Jillian's black team, by contrast, had been eking out just enough weight loss to win the weigh-ins, but they seem especially dependent on Jillian for the push that makes the difference. Jillian, you may remember, forces her team to face their emotional dependencies on food and has created strong bonds with each of the members of her team. As a result, Jillian called each of her "people" when they were home, twice a day, to check on them and remind them of their goals and potential pitfalls. Of all the members of the black team, only Paul refused to speak with Jillian while home. This proved a tragic mistake.

The homecomings were interesting and touching and some people, like Mark, the overbearing control freak who has been at the center of much of the controversy on campus, immediately pulled donuts out of the mouths of his children and threw away everything in the house that could prove a temptation. His kids were crying, his wife was surprised, but he was determined to go back to campus a winner. Uh, a loser. This is where it gets confusing.

Mark also pushed his brother Jay, both of whom live outside of Boston, and while this sometimes annoyed Jay, he listened to his older brother. After last week's episode, where the blue team lost the weigh-in by a pound, Jay, who had the lowest weight loss felt entirely responsible. So he was also very determined to do well while home. This determination, coupled with what they learned on campus, proved a powerful combination. Jay lost the most weight of anyone and at the weigh-in, Bob's team demolished Jillian's team and for the first time in weeks, the black team headed to the elimination room.

Paul, marked for elimination for a variety of reasons, including his own defeatist attitude, was sent home. This leaves Kelly alone on what used to be the yellow team.

Paul. A big guy with a lot of emotional issues, many of which were exposed on the show. But perhaps the biggest issue was that he was still in love with Kelly, his ex-wife and partner on The Biggest Loser. So as long as Paul was with Kelly, he rose to every challenge, lost a lot of weight, and kept the promise he made to himself to get healthy and live longer than his father lived. But as soon as he went home, his unhappiness made him vulnerable to his emotions and his loss, and he ate three massive plates of buffalo wings, large glasses of soda, and mountains of cake. He also refused to answer or return Jillian's calls. And in that scene at the very end of the show, where we get to see how the eliminated player is doing, we learn that Paul came down with double pneumonia as soon as he got home and actually gained six pounds.

We don't have a lot of hope for Paul. His issues are deep and his coping mechanisms are not exactly finely honed. He has a long way to go.

So the question remains: is it really better to have loved and lost? In Paul's case, we're not so sure. But we wish him luck and hope that he makes healthier choices now that he's home.

(c) NBC Universal.

Related Topics:

• How to Think Like a Thin Person
• Lose Weight for Life

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